i can get dates with girls, keeping em interested is hard

[joe45]

heres the problem , been meeting a couple of gals off the net myspace , okcupid, went out, the longest being 2 months and that was only once a wk, with all 5 of em they all tell me-no connection , no chemistry.

ok what is with this? any guys here have this problem before, and how many gals do u have to date before finding thr real right gf.

 

do u think its my lack of experience with girls, 25 with dating and girl experience of a 15 yr old.

i mean i can get a date ,but keeping em and getting em interested or for long is like -they have no interest mostly after the 2nd date.i mean i don;t think i did anything wrong- i don't swear, didn't burp or fart, didn't talk about sex, just alll and all casual small talk like school, work , hobbies and what not she and i are interested in.

 

any comments

[dogheadma]

You're in what I refer to as the "practice date" phase. Just relax, be yourself, and have a good time. Miss right will come along at some point but don't concern yourself about when. Just enjoy!

[chai714]

Joe,

 

At the foundation of all great relationships is a friendship.

 

So, what makes us choose the friends we have now? We likely have similar ideas concerning life, similar hobbies, or are in a similar stage in our lives. With women, it's no different. Establish what you 2 have in common. Figure out what she likes, what her interests are, and talk about those.

 

You also need to be aloof at times. If you're doing all the chasing, then stop. Where being aloof comes into play is that a) it prevents them from taking you for granted and b) it builds tension (if they're interested).

 

Think about the last time you really liked a woman and she didn't respond to you or you weren't sure if she was going to respond or not. There was an element called, "hope." This "hope" is what humans thrive on to continue liking someone. Is the element of "hope" present when there is "certainty?" Of course not. It's much like a kid during Christmas. He or she "hopes" they get that one thing they really want. They become anxious, even uneasy at times and have doubt. But they have "hope." If they knew they were going to get that toy, do you think the element of "hope" would exist? Of course not. So, make sure you're not removing all doubts from your targets.

 

Otherwise, if you don't have much in common with these women then you should drop them. Why waste their time or yours?

 

Good luck.

[Beec]

OK, no chemistry. What they are really telling you is that they are simply not that attracted to you. Now, we know that this is not because of how you look, because they did agree to go out with you. So, if it is not your physical appearance, it has to be how you act. Doesn't it?

 

Your actions, probably, are not aloof enough and probably you do not let any tension develop. Do you let them know you are interested? Bang, that shoots down any chance for tension developing. Do you let them know you want a relationship with them? Boom, the chances of it happening just crash-landed. You need to have some tension, some doubt about if you are interested, then you release that doubt, and that creates chemistry.

 

Imagine a woman sitting accross from you for dinner on a date and you jsut cannot tell if she is interested or not. She looks like maybe at times, and then not, you are just not sure. And as dinner is over, imagine how you feel? Confused, tense, nervous, that's tension. (Stop and imagine, then scroll down).

 

 

 

 

 

Now, when she kisses you quickly right outside, now how do you feel. Imagine it. (scroll down after you do).

 

 

 

 

 

What happened to the butterflies? What happened? The tension was released.