The first steps in befriending online communication....

[flyingspaghetti]

What are they?

 

Without sounding weird but trying to get to know someone to befriend them online first, how do you not sound weird or creepy? I would like to try and talk with a local girl who has some of the same interests (writing, poetry, making friends). We started writing back-and-forth, and it seems like she stopped after her third message to me. It was the same thing with three guys I wanted to befriend prior to her. One of these guys is this girl's husband. It's been eight days since I have heard from her. My own mind is driving me crazy wondering if it was something I said in my last message. But...why do people take it for granted that once you are in their list, they seem to stop after the third message? How can I get to know others if that is persisitently happening.

 

The thing I find annoying is that people take it for granted that being in someone's Friends list on MySpace (yes, MySpace) they tend to stop writing emails to you. This girl and two of the three guys before her sounded like they all really wanted to write me/get to know me. They have said stuff like, "Well, I hope to hear back from you" and "thank you for writing me. I would like to get to know you more." And these are people who have "Friends" next to their "Here for" part of their profile. But... I am looking to make actual local/in-town friends or at least get to know people, you know. Why do they say these things if they stop writing after three messages?

 

So, how do I NOT sound creepy? I mean, think about it and please place yourself in my shoes: if you are trying to talk with someone you would like to talk more with and even hang out with, how would you go about it without sounding pushy or impatient (even if I am)? There are qualities of these popel that I really like about them as potential friends. And, the whole "they might be busy" phrase doesn't convince me. I have noticed they get online on an almost daily basis (two of them and the other two are a couple of times per week), and I have seen some of them leave comments on their other friends' pages. So.... what is happening???? Why would people who claim to want to make friends take advantage of just keeping you in their friends' list? And, these people don't have 100s of people either. So, it's not like they just add anyone.

 

Any ideas? I am just running into corners.

 

I would be most interested in hearing from people who have actual MySpace accounts and who are somewhat familiar with the interaction that goes on. And, no, I would prefer not to hear things like, "That's why I don't use those things, etc." For one, I am using it to socialize since I have a difficult time in doing so in person, I was recommended to use this website. And I find it odd how I have had the same thing happen with four different people. What is going on? Any of you had similiar experiences on MySpace? Thanks to all replies.

[robowarrior]

oh come on, making friends on-line is the most easy thing in life possible. You just goto an pen-pall site, say im lalala and i want to write lalala, and not with a person that stops after 3 lines, i want chain mails.

 

Well there' a bunch of people there, well next to that there's infinite chatrooms, you can chat to everyone you like. Not that its healthy or fruitfull all the time but its easy as hell.

 

Just say HI

 

for a start, then say im person (x) i like (hobby z) and age/sex/location ASL and then start bla bla bla ing.

 

Look, talking is the most normal thing in the world right? So don't think your strange or anything , people won't mind talking to you, if they do you'll notice quickly enough, but don't let that make you stop from meeting new people.

[flyingspaghetti]

oh come on, making friends on-line is the most easy thing in life possible. You just goto an pen-pall site, say im lalala and i want to write lalala, and not with a person that stops after 3 lines, i want chain mails.

 

Well there' a bunch of people there, well next to that there's infinite chatrooms, you can chat to everyone you like. Not that its healthy or fruitfull all the time but its easy as hell.

 

Just say HI

 

for a start, then say im person (x) i like (hobby z) and age/sex/location ASL and then start bla bla bla ing.

 

Look, talking is the most normal thing in the world right? So don't think your strange or anything , people won't mind talking to you, if they do you'll notice quickly enough, but don't let that make you stop from meeting new people.

Well, yes, I do understand the basic fundamentals of making friends. No doubt about that. I guess I was just letting off my own personal steam because it certainly feels like I tend to come accross the same pattern with everyone I have written with. Communication just....halts or pauses....

 

Well, a funny thing happened.... late last night she wrote me a comment saying she hadn't heard from me in a while and would hope to hear back from me. Wow!!! Haha...how funny how we BOTH were thinking the same thing!! That tells me one of our messages didn't go through, and we were both wondering about each other. She was just the first one to make mention of it. I am going to write her a message in a while. That was pretty unexpected but really cool...