When a man says we need to take time apart to think?

[Macckusha]

hehe me too. never-to-late, are you there? whatever happened?

[lovesick7]

I am kind of dealing with the same issue except he did not come right out and say that he needed time. I just went ahead and offered it to him because he basically said that he didn't quite know for sure what was going on with our relationship.. We have not been fighting - actually the opposite so this talk that we had came out of left field for meand shocked me. But i was calm - aske if he wanted to break up - no, asked if this is a fixable situation he said yes and that he loved me. Stayed the night, kissed me the next morning as usual and told me to have a great day - I sent him a text that said i was willing to give him some time if thats what he wanted.. no response. Later that night he asked what i was doing - i hesitated and then responded telling him what i was doing. He responded back that he had made some plans with his roommate - which he really did. I left him alone that night and then sent him a light hearted "hope you had a good day" and no response. So now i am wondering if it is the space that he is wanting. I am trying to be positive but its hard - i have not pushed the issue with him until saturday which was day 6 - he obviously got annoyed and a little upset and i dropped it. I then got a text late that night asking if i was awake - which i was not so there was no response. Yesterday - day 7 i did not hear from him but i did send him a message saying sorry i was asleep, sorry i missed your text. no response. Today i broke down and sent a text hoping he had a great day. he responded "thanks for the text hope you had a great day also" Nothing more. I guess i am just needing some support here so that i can do the NC so he can decide what he wants. I will admit i am losing a little hope right now because i thought if it is fixable that he would want to at least text a little more.. Anyway.. just need to support to not text him!! Thanks!

 

p.s. we are 30 and 31

[Asmokraemer]

It's been 5 months since the vacation-no-contact-for-2-weeks thing and...it's the same stuff? Or am I misunderstanding?

 

Did anything spur this talk? Like, did you suddenly spend lots of close bonding time together and now he wants space? What happened before the talk?

[lovesick7]

actually we had been spending ALOT more time than we are used to right before the talk for the like the last month prior to this talk we were together for almost every day like we were living with each other but he would just go to his house in the morning to shower. He said that it was like we had taken each other for granted and was going through the motions... I am worried right now because he is telling people when they ask how we are doing that we are not doing so good, yet he wont come talk to me if he is wanting to work it out, so i am heart broken of course thinking the worse and have basically thought that the break up is coming. I dont understand where it came from because he had just left me a cute litttle love not on my counter the week prior to this talk.. I was completely shocked for him to say he felt the way he did.

 

Do i just continue to give time.. granted we have text here and there but i usually dont get a response and if i do it is very short. we were at the same event last saturday and he did come and say hi to me first, however after that he pretty much avoided me and we were definitely not a couple at this even which broke my heart. He is a very sensitve person and honest. So i dont think that he knows what he is doing, but yet at the same time its not looking good. Thanksgiving is in two days and i dont even know what we are going to do, if anything. Pretty terrifed that the big talk is giong to be tonight....

[jjw]

Question is - Is there any hope for the relationship to continue when he says that he needs time apart to think? I am devasted to think that this is his way of breaking up with me and am holding on to the hope that he will call...... ?

[ddnnbb23]

I definitely needed this post! i haven't talked to my "ex/boyfriend/i don't even know what to call him" in 5 days. It's killing me. He said he needed time to think. so i said ok thats fine. (even though it tore me apart). then he texts me one day later saying he's ready to be with me again. I told him there was no way he could "think" that much in 24hrs. His response? "Oh yea...you're right...i will text u when i'm ready." I want to move on but i can't. I love him so much. Love officially sucks. I feel like he doesn't even care. Goodluck to the rest of

you!