What the hell???

[DetHMetaLDolL]

So I posted this thread here asking for advice about this woman I work with.

 

 

 

She is a clingy person who is starting to really get on my nerves. She always asks me all kinds of questions about what I am doing, where I am going after work, what I did the night before. I know people reading this are probably thinking it's just friendly conversation. But it doesn't come off that way. I feel like I am being interogated. And when she talks to me she gets right in my face. She alsways sits beside me at break and she sits way too close. I have a real problem with my space being invaded.

 

The other day I was bending over sitting a box on a pallet and I guess my lower back was showing. She came up behind me and pulled the back of my jeans up! I didn't like that at all. I don't like being touched, especially when I don't see it coming. Today when I was standing in the clock out line she started fidding with me hair. I just dyed it, she said she was looking at the color. She doesn't need to touch it to see the color.

 

She ran into my Mom at an Italian Festival in my town last week. She said to my Mom "I was thinking of getting some of my friends together for a party, and I was wondering if we could have it at your house?" My mom politely told her no. I should mention that this woman lives at the salvation Army, so she can't have a party at her house. And it was a whole bunch of SA residents she wanted to invite to this party. She has only met my Mom once!!! Then the next day she came to work and told me "Oh your Mom and I were talking about having a party out at your house." She said this like it was already planned and my Mom was ok with it.

 

She has also referred to my Granma as "Grandma" like she is talking about her grandma. She met my Grandma at the italian fest where grandma was selling sandwitches.

 

She hasn't been picking me up in the morning anymore. When I came downstairs two days in a row and found her sitting on my porch waiting for me I had to put a stop to that. I was polite about it though.

 

But here is the kicker... this made me really mad. A family member of mine just died less then a month ago. Well, this chick at work has found an apartment. (She found the place yesterday. Today at work she had the gaul to ask me : I really need some pots and pans and cookware for my new place... IS your *******'s house all cleaned out? Do you think maybe I could have some of their kitchen stuff?" This made me freaking livid. I didn't even answer her. Then she goes on to say "My husband left me with nothing, and I can't sue him for my stuff back because I can't afford a lawyer." I told her "Apply for legal aid then." and walked away.

 

Help! What should I do? I feel like this person is fixated on me!

 

PLease keep in mind that I am female and straight. My last thread got a lot of misguided advice because people thought I was a man. I am DethmetalDOLL, not DethmetalDUDE, lol.

 

PLease, I would appreciate some advice...

 

Luka

[Scotcha]

There was a clingy girl that wanted very badly to be my friend for awhile and she was relentless. I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. I just didn't want to be friends with her either. I made a lot of excuses.. "I'm so busy, etc.." Maybe screen your calls for awhile.

 

It's trickier because you work with her but maybe tell her that you like taking breaks by yourself and would rather be alone to de-stress from work or something. Blame it on you, not her. Also, I would make a point to tell her that you do not like to be touched and that she needs to stop..

 

Eventually she should either take the hint or decide that you're not the kind of friend she wants. If she doesn't you might just have to be blunt and tell her out right that you have enough on your plate and are not looking for any more friends.

[NJRon]

Wow... I'm just appalled about the whole kitchenware story. The only thing you can do sometimes is be distant and, if that doesn't work... blunt.

[HellFrost666]

Luka,

She's a wackjob. That is all there is to it. She sounds like a real mooch too. I can't believe she would ask you for some of your dead relative's stuff...

 

Since you work with her you can't really distance yourself from her. But you can be aloof to her at work. When she sits with you on break don't say anything.

[NJRon]

Oh yeah, and by the way, if someone touches you in a way that makes you feel uncomfortable at work, it doesn't matter what sex they are, it's still harrasment. One verbal wanring and then off to HR.

[RayKay]

Yeah....um, this is not the most balanced and un-objective enotalone advice I have ever given but...she is not very stable.

 

For those older ones reading this..reminds me of a Single White Female scenario!

 

She is at the very least "clingy" but I suspect she may have some deeper mental health issues.

 

I would definitely avoid her, if she touches you again be very firm that you do NOT like being touched...and tell her to stop calling your family "gramma or mom" or whatever. If avoiding her does not do trick, tell her she needs to leave you alone..if she harasses you, I would even file a report at work.

 

I can't believe she asked about the kitchen stuff. I respect she has some needs right now, but maybe something along the lines of "you know, I am just wondering if you knew of anyplace I could get affordable stuff for my new place etc" would of been way better than "can I have your dead relatives stuff?". Ick!