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the reason my handle is called workaholic is..

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because it describes who I am; a successful full-timer who's lost his basic instincts to attract and eventually date women. However, the good news is that I might change my handle!


I went to get some coffee at a corner cafe..part of my regular humdrum routine and the most beautiful woman was behind the counter. The amazing thing about it was her beaming smile matched mine..and she couldn't take her eyes off of me. She lost her concentration and overfilled my coffee, then came around the counter and wiped it up while talking about how much she enjoyed the cafe's premier blend. She really likes me, and it's a cinch to go back to this cafe tomorrow and start up a conversation!


The future is murky, though..which is why I need to ask this most elementary of questions:


How does a connection usually develop between a man and a woman that eventually leads to a successful relationship or a fling? I realize that flirting is a part of it, however my situation is different. Even though we're the only two people in the cafe, we are still in our roles: Customer, and Employee.

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Dude, first of all go to these sites for a ton of info

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Second, your roles are actually man and woman so don't get that confused. The next time you talk to her, let the conversation flow like it did today, then ask for her phone number. It would've been best if you would've aske for it today, but no worries. Then you call her, if things go right set up a meeting.


You can do it. Get out there and keep talking to other girls. It's never too late to learn these skills.

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I actually recommend flirting a bit longer and saying things like, "you're fun" and "I really like talking to you" before you ask her out or ask for her number.


When I worked behind a counter, I got asked out all the time because people mistook my "friendly customer service skills" for flirting.


I suggest making it clear that there is an attraction before you drop an "I'd like to take you out" on her.


That's MY opinion anyway....

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Yes, I agree with Ta ree saw, do some friendly flirting first. I know when guys ask me out without getting to know me first, I completely ignore them, it's just a protection mechanism, not to let someone into my personal safe space unless I know they are a good person. Maybe that's just me, but I would maybe ask her what her favorite coffee is and say you would like to try that one, yes, it's cheesy, but keep getting to know her more. Tell her more about yourself, she needs to feel comfortable with you before she can say yes. Interject some humor too.

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