What do you girls and guys think?

[fromfaraway]

Hello everyone ,

I have a question concerning an ex girlfriend. So I met this girl more than two years ago. I was 25 and she was 23. I was her boyfriend, her first lover, and her first every thing. She is very shy, and because of her childhood she developed a fear of commitment(she is the most faithful person I have ever seen. She is very shy as well).

 

We fell for each other so deeply, and she wanted to see her parents in Chicago. After that she had a panic attack, and she broke it off. we tried to be friends, but it did not work out: it did not feel real. She was always very interested to talk to me and be around me.

 

We did not speak for two years. A few months ago, she sent me a short email to say hi. I replied very quickly and was very excited. I suppose I freaked her out so she did not write again. I ran into her recently, and she seemed very happy to see me. She was with her family and I was with a friend. We chatted briefly, and my friend--without knowning who she was--told me that it was obvious that this girl liked me a lot.

 

A couple of days later, I received a very friendly email from her. I waited for a few days and answered in a very friendly way as well--she always told me she thinks I am the best person she has ever known.

 

What do you guys think about all of this? Do you think that she still has feelings for me or that she is just being friendly?

 

As for me, I still care for her very much. Do you think it is a good idea to send her a friendly note from time to time, or just drop it?

 

Thanks you very much for any feedback!

 

Yours trully,

 

Fromfaraway

[skyjuice]

Hi

 

Just go for it. Send her some friendly note and see how things goes, but be prepare for the worst.

 

Wish you good luck.

[fromfaraway]

Thanks guest for your reply!

What do other people think?

[Considerate Empath]

Agreed with Guest at the moment, but don't quite get the reason as to why you two broke up. Tell me more about why/how you guys broke up and let's see if the opinion changes.

 

 

//C.E.

[fromfaraway]

Thanks considerate empath !

 

She was so excited about me, so she wanted to take our relationship to the next step. She invited me to go to meet her parents in Chicago. Her parents are divorced, and they live separately. I called her there once, and she was not there, but I talked to her sister. My ex told me later that her sister was very excited to talk to me, but that was NOT the impression I got. They are Jewish and I am from a group that does not have great realtions with Jews currently.

 

After that she changed the plan, and I did not go to meet her family. She broke up with me as soon as she came back, but she wanted to hang out with me and see me. She always seemed very keen at doing things with me and at being around me--she said that to me as well.

 

I was so lost and confused. before me, she would freak out after hanging out with a guy for about a month. She never had a serious relationship. I wonder whether it had any thing with her parents divorce. As far as I am concerned, I tried to tell her that I accept her the way she is. I deeply loved her, and was willing to do whatever takes to make her feel secure.

 

I hope this helps.

 

fromfaraway.

[Considerate Empath]

In that case, I say go for it! If you really love her and think that she loves you back, then it's worth a shot! No one would be happier than I to think that there's a little bit more love in the world

 

Or well... there would likely be more than me to think the same way I do, but you know what I mean.

 

I hope you get her back and that you'll be happy whether if you do or don't get her back anyways. Best wishes.

 

 

//C.E.

[robowarrior]

Personally i would try, just talk to her about it if she thinks she is ready now or that she still needs time, tell her that your life is short and you might be going into another relationship, that way you can pressurize her to finally initiate a step into being commited to you.

[need2bme]

Take it slow and talk to her. I have found out the hard way, that you have to talk.

 

Good luck and go for it.

[joyce1412]

i agree with everyone that she is worth investing some effort into. it doesn't hurt to stay in friendly contact and let her know that you're there for her. that little effort might go a long way.

 

i hope she doesn't disappoint you...it always seems that the commitment-phobes out there are the hardest to figure out, as well as the hardest to date.