Do I play hard to get - loosing her. I NEED HELP!

[Armyguy3682003]

Well I feel that some how my relationship is slowly going the wrong way. We have so much fun together and the other night she came by after the night before I could read she wanted to come back with me, but I didnt read it and got mad. So she came over and we kissed and one thing let to another, but never had sex. She is insisted on not having sex for she is leaving in 8 months and feels that it will bring us too close. So, she was really into me and then got up, put her shirt back on and left. I could tell she was upset. So the next day, she came over for some pictures. I tried to kiss her, but she kind of gave me the cold shoulder. I said I wanted to give her a kiss, so she finally did. I think she is confused and wants to have sex, but has told herself no and the other day made our relationship worse. I realized I dont want to have sex with her cause its going to ruin or relationship. I will enjoy what we have now until she leaves in 8 months, but feel that she is questioning everything. My question is do I play hard to get. Try not to kiss her and dont try to intiate things together? I DONT want to loose her playing these stupid idiotic games, I hate this head games. But I feel that she needs the same things played back to her. We have so much fun together, I write her poems every week. When I dont talk to her or see her, she says she misses me. But I really feel that our so called relationship is stalled and need some help or answers to know what to do next. I've even told myself that is over, getting ready for the end so I dont get hurt when it does end, but I feel I am still trying, trying to kiss her, when she is playing hard to get / games. Any suggestions what to do next, please help me!

[JJRadical]

Huh? Just focus on getting home safe...

[cacain119]

Hey, you need ta teach my guy a thing or two! Sounds like you really like her. My advice to you is to ALSO consider that she is leaving in 8mo. Think about you for a moment.. Think about what's going to get YOU too close to her -- and I would agree.. the sex thing may be premature if you are going to have distance. Do you want to "stay together" over the distance? Where is she going off too any way (I just can't think of a scenario where I would *know* I'm leaving in exactly 8mo, I found that weird). I would just have a sit-down talk with her. You two are adults -- you're right, there's no need for head games. You just need to say *Look, let's get on the same page... What do YOU need.. and here's what *I* need*

 

Be straight but loving towards each other. I just feel this might be leaving for heartache if she knows she's leaving anyway...

[Aschleigh]

You are 34 years old and you worry that sex is going to mess up your relationship?

Are you very religious or very inexperienced in relationships.

Is she?

If you want to have sex with her and she wants to have sex with you, then what's the problem?

She may move away in 8 months, you may get killed by a bus tomorrow.

Who waits to have sex anymore?

How old is she? Is she a virgin?

Yes you will become attached, Yes it will hurt when she moves. Yes you will have to figure out what kind of relationship you want to have while she is away?

But you're not having that much fun right now. Talk to her. Any women who is still playing the you can kiss me but don't have sex with me is suspect to begin with. Sex is great. It should be done a lot, especially with people you like a lot.

Find a women who understands this. Going away in 8 months? that's a whole relationship there that she won't let even begin.

I don't understand why a 34 year old man would deal with this nonsense for long.

[JustNormal]

Probably because he's cracking open a girl 12 years his junior. Guys have to worry about this stuff. Girls get their picture posted in playboy for the effort. It's that double standard thing that makes guys our age think twice. Check your local news for details.

 

But I think in this case, since she's cleared legal age a few years back, it's more of a maturity thing. She ain't got it and he does. Hence the delima.