Suicidle All The Time

[msmorbid]

Hi im new here,

 

wright just now im so pissed of its unbelieveable, for the last two days iv been looking at 2 bottles of 500mg of parocetomal and seriously thinking about swallowing them. Dont know whats stopping me i want out of this world iv been suicidle on and of all my life. Iv been batteling an ongoing lost cause of depression,moodswings, and severe selfloathing all my life and cant fight no more i give up. Im a missfit usless and a complete faliure and have achieved nothing for my time on this earth. Even when i get positve about doing something with my life i cant see it threw because depression and other mental issues f...k it up. I have nothing to live for no partner ,friends, career enjoyment, i feel like an outcast from society a freak like iv always been detached from others like im an imposter of my own body, feel brain dead.Theres something seriously wrong with me my lifes one big missrable experience i dont live i excist, im sick of it.

Im sick of moaning and being negative feeling sorry for myself im ashamed of wasting my life and not being stronger .Im sick of being jealious of everyones happiness being me is torture i want out, its frustrating knowing life can be good for folk . I wonder what its like to be happy and have a fufilling life something il never know.

 

Anyway i dont care if i go to hell im already there besides i dont believe in god , anyone else feeling bad rest asured you wont be as a big waste of space as what i am

[dnl940]

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Is there anyone you can call and talk to? I know that you are feeling a lot of pain right now, but this is not the answer. Give your pills to someone else and get them out of your sight. Feel free to pm me. You can get through this.

[Dako]

So who'd miss you? That's not a rhetorical question, but I wonder if your passing might cause others to suffer. We're often connected to someone we care for that might be really hurt if they got the news.

 

What have you been doing to deal with depression besides stocking up on drugs and planning to leave? Have you been in a relationship with a professional? Leaning on friends? Anything?

[JustxHer]

Suicidal isn't the answer. I know from a recent expierience. I almost died a few days ago because a boy broke my heart. Trust me it isn't the right answer. You need someone to talk to or maybe just some TLC (tender love and care)

[mgirl]

Iv been batteling an ongoing lost cause of depression,moodswings, and severe selfloathing all my life and cant fight no more i give up. Im a missfit usless and a complete faliure and have achieved nothing for my time on this earth.

 

This is precisely why you SHOULD stay. Because you are strong, you're a fighter and we need more of you. You are not a misfit, you are a valid human being with a right to life like everyone else.

 

and have achieved nothing for my time on this earth

 

How do you know that? Just the very fact you are posting here and being honest IS an achievement. Believe me, there are not many people i know who are honest, little lone prepared to speak about it.

 

its frustrating knowing life can be good for folk

 

You know, sometimes i really wonder if this is true... Do we all feel this way underneath but are some people better than others at hiding it? I am not sure we're all as happy as you can say. I think that deep down on some level, a lot of people feel lonely and as isolated as you, but are afraid of saying it. The first step in dealing with a problem is acknowledging it and you should applaud yourself for saying what you have said today. Stop being so hard on yourself

[mgirl]

Why don't you stick around so we can get to know you a little?

[Dako]

There are plenty of folks here with depression, and some have some good ideas that might help.

[msmorbid]

Its amazing that strangers put time and effort into listening and trying to help more than your own family dose. I see what your all trying to say i would say the same if i read a post like that, but just the thought of having a another year it feeling this way is enough to make me want to jump of a cliff.I Have so many obsticals to overcome that i dont think iv got the will or drive to fight,iv tryed it all before, i just want to be put out of my missery im constantly tormented by all these flashbacks being in my own skin makes me sick.

 

but im still here its like being in limbo

 

i feel bad for even getting on like this

[mgirl]

Well, i used to think i didn't deserve to be here, but the fact is i was born and i am here, thereforeeee i deserve to be. And so should you. You know, the sperm has to float up a long way to get to the ovary. It's no small feat.

[Proactive Paradigm]

anyone else feeling bad rest asured you wont be as a big waste of space as what i am

 

Nope, that's my line. I object.

[Bethany]

If you can't fight anymore, then STOP FIGHTING. If you feel that your battling against a lost cause, it's because you are. It's you own constant battle and fight against yourself that is keeping you there.Your gonna fight yourself to death if your not careful.

Stop fighting, loosen your body, let go of yourself and let it all come, then take a long, good look at what you fight .... If you do this, you will find a different way out.