msmorbid

hi, Your not crazy your just sad, i was like that depressed low self estem ,then when i had my son and being pregnant i felt id finally achieved something worthwhile. I was young to, did my best to nurture and care for him but my circumstances grew hard and i let it get the better of me before i knew it got depressed again had a breakdown, and my son now lives with his father i just see him at weekends .Theres not a day that dosnt pass that i dont regret it or feel guilty even suicidle, but what youv got to rememember its fight to get strong so you can be there for your child in the future or maybe get custody of her again. Your not a bad mother you care if you didnt care you wouldnt be posting here about it. Dont be hard on yourself 15yr is young i can be easy to be overwhelmed by the responsibility of a child, you cant change the past but you can change the future , my advice is stop beating yourself up and concentrate on your future with your daughter, cause believe me i had myself feeling that bad about my son and everything else i nearly swallowed a bottle of pills, then were would my son be motherless. take care

Its amazing that strangers put time and effort into listening and trying to help more than your own family dose. I see what your all trying to say i would say the same if i read a post like that, but just the thought of having a another year it feeling this way is enough to make me want to jump of a cliff.I Have so many obsticals to overcome that i dont think iv got the will or drive to fight,iv tryed it all before, i just want to be put out of my missery im constantly tormented by all these flashbacks being in my own skin makes me sick. but im still here its like being in limbo i feel bad for even getting on like this

Hi im new here, wright just now im so pissed of its unbelieveable, for the last two days iv been looking at 2 bottles of 500mg of parocetomal and seriously thinking about swallowing them. Dont know whats stopping me i want out of this world iv been suicidle on and of all my life. Iv been batteling an ongoing lost cause of depression,moodswings, and severe selfloathing all my life and cant fight no more i give up. Im a missfit usless and a complete faliure and have achieved nothing for my time on this earth. Even when i get positve about doing something with my life i cant see it threw because depression and other mental issues f...k it up. I have nothing to live for no partner ,friends, career enjoyment, i feel like an outcast from society a freak like iv always been detached from others like im an imposter of my own body, feel brain dead.Theres something seriously wrong with me my lifes one big missrable experience i dont live i excist, im sick of it. Im sick of moaning and being negative feeling sorry for myself im ashamed of wasting my life and not being stronger .Im sick of being jealious of everyones happiness being me is torture i want out, its frustrating knowing life can be good for folk . I wonder what its like to be happy and have a fufilling life something il never know. Anyway i dont care if i go to hell im already there besides i dont believe in god , anyone else feeling bad rest asured you wont be as a big waste of space as what i am