My Ordeal

[dnl940]

I have been coming to this site for a few months, and at times it has really helped me. I wanted to retrace my ordeal from this past weekend in the hopes that maybe it will help someone else.

 

This past Friday, I reached the lowest point I have ever been in my life. At approximately 9pm I called and told my children that I loved them, and then proceeded to swallow a bottle of sleeping pills with the thought that my pain would come to an end. Because my ex wife new that I was acting funny, and because of some other things that had happened during the day, she decided to call 911. They came to my house and transported me to the hospital and my life was saved.

 

I really thought that this was the answer to my problems and didn't care about the consequences of my actions. When my parents found out what had happened they of course came rushing to my house, only to be met by the police who were not willing to let them enter until they had deemed everything to be under control inside first. My father did not like this and proceeded to scuffle with the policeman, and apparently my mother did also. 24 hours later they were both arrested and transported to jail, where they had to spend the night with real criminals, because of my actions. My parents are 65 and 61 years old.

 

Though I am definitely still not well, I unfortunately have had to face the initial consequences of my actions. Thinking that my suicide would make my problems go away, and that other peoples lives would have been better, was a horrible mistake. My actions have caused even more problems for the people in my life. I have been reflecting on the events of this past weekend, and even though I'm not sure that something like this will never happen again, I can definitely say that I regret how my suicide attempt has made things worse for other people, when I irrationally thought that things would get better for other people.

 

Though I have not spelled out all of the details to my situation, I am hoping that just these facts alone will help someone else consider the consequences of their actions before taking that next step. Thank you for listening.

[Ash]

A terrible lesson to learn, but hopefully you have forever. Mark that as the low point and start the climb back up.

 

No matter how crappy life seems, it will get better. Although not in quite the same place you were, I hit a low a few years ago. Thank heavens I had a good friend who made it so worth talking to that I did that instead of going for the pills. Since that, I've not looked back and it hasn't happened again.

 

Sometimes it can take some courage to face the world every day. You just have to keep on doing it.

 

If you don't already have a counsellor, you should see about getting one. It can be uplifting itself to have somebody to talk to an hour or two a week who is completely non-judgemental, and is not tied to whatever personal situations you might have. It's strictly confidential. When I went to counselling I looked forward to being able to talk without fear of repcrecussions. If you don't like a counsellor, request another one. It should be somebody you can talk to freely. For me, it was a lady, I'm more comfortable talking about many things with a member of the opposite sex.

 

Keep on pushing ahead.

Things will improve.

[Spugly Fuglet]

Yes you had a close shave, as many have told me here seek help asap.

A sickness can make you do things you regert for years, get the pain out and into the hands of thows that know what to do with it.