ex's parents keep on calling me, should i return calls?

[disruptors]

Hey guys, basically I grew very close with my ex's parents. She wants this break up after 3 years and I have not spoken with her about it since we broke up about 4 weeks ago. The point I just have to make and ask is since I've done NC, like i havent called,text'd, or talked to her about our relationship, even though I have seen her at university a few times, said hi, and even took a picture with her at Bermuda shorts day two days ago(BAD IDEA, I was so wasted I didnt even know) should I return the phone calls her parents are making to me? I know its them bc they are using their cell phones to let me know its them and not my ex? But in a way my NC is to flush her and everything that has to do with her out of my system? But then again I love her parents and am I just being totally inconsiderate and rude by not answering their phone calls, let returning them? I just know they want to talk to me but I know in the end it wont change my ex's decision which is to stay broken up.

[DN]

I think I would talk to them once and explain that it is difficult for you to talk to them, at least until you are properly over your ex.

[coollady1957]

I agree with DN, that maybe you should talk to them at least once, explain that you are trying to get over her decision to break up. If you talk to them, they will at least know you are okay and trying to deal with it all.

[shes2smart]

I agree with DN & coollady.

 

Once you are over the initial stages of the break-up, there's nothing to prevent you from re-establishing a realtionship with your ex's parents. My college bf stayed in touch with my parents after he & I broke up. In fact, he still stays in touch with my parents even though I broke off contact with them about 7 years ago.

 

Let them know what's going on with you, and let them know you need a little space right now. When you're feeling stronger & up to it, you can then decide if you want to continue a relationship with them.

[Lita43]

Wow! You have alot of posts up. What kinds of hobbies or things do you do in your life??? Lita~

[DN]

Do you mean me? I am heavily involved in community theatre as producer, director, stage-manager etc. and am president of the group. I am also president of a community theatre association and a director of my condo board. But how is that relevant to this thread?

[Lita43]

In reply to your message about the relevance of this thread, that even though it seems to me that you have some interests to keep you busy, it's not apparently enough. People need a pretty good amount of time to heal after break-up or divorce, so focus on other interests in life and find a personal understanding friend to talk with (not on-line). Advice columns can be helpful, but never replaces human contact to just hang out and talk, so maybe there are some self esteem or security issues to be addressed first. Never give up the quest, but sometime's it's best to take focus and reflect on yourself first. Good Luck! Lita~

[DN]

I think you may be getting people mixed up on this thread.

[ocrob]

I think that if she broke up with you, then you should definitely say hello to her parents. I am starting to think that even if you broke up with her you should still say hello. That is pretty cool when the parents reach out to you. They must like you either way. I don' know weather you are the breaker or the breakee, but you should defintely reach out. If it is hard, then tell them, but don't disrespect them. They obviously like you and you should give them the explanation. It is awesome they would reach out to you. They obiiously like you. You have to do it.Just do it.

[Lita43]

I appologize DN as you are correct in mixing up threads, ergo don't post when you're tired and re-read former posts first. So Sorry about that really!!! Anyway It's really awesome that you love your ex's parents, but if it hurts too much to talk to them right now, then you should really tell them this. Ask if it's ok for them to give you some time to work through your emotions and if it would be ok for you to contact them when you feel more healed. Lita~