What will spur a shy guy to ask a girl out?

[ladeedah]

What factors might cause a shy guy to push beyond his fears and ask a girl he likes out? Does it have to do with how the girl acts or is there nothing she can do. Please don't say "Ask him out" That's not an option at this point. Thanks

[tmp0620]

Depends on the guy. There IS something you can do: don't be subtle, a lot of times a shy guy will need to know for sure that a girl likes him before he'll take any action. Hang out with him 1 on 1 a few times if it's possible.

[easyguy]

What factors might cause a shy guy to push beyond his fears and ask a girl he likes out?

Breaking the ice.

[SilverManic]

I'm shy myself and it takes a lot of courage to ask someone out, I normally wouldn't do it. I think it's the same for boys and girls. Just tell him that you like him if possible. I've done in the past.. even though I'm shy.

GL,

~S.

[ComputerGuy]

Depends how shy the guy is. Some guys will eventually just get sick of it all and ask to get it out of the way, others will sit forever and never say anything no matter how obvious you make it you want him to. I know you said you cant ask him but I really dont understand why...it doesn't make sense and if it gets you together what does it matter who asked?

[Jonboy582]

I myself am quite a shy guy and stuck in same prediciment. Basically the reason being I am no good about reading signs from girls that are aimed towards me so I have no idea what this girl is thinking. So for now, I just sticking with subtle flirting and stuff. But thing is, if I found out from someone that she did infact like me, and situations that have occurred between us were for the reasons I hope they were then I would askher out. So basically whhat im saying is maybe get someone to drop a hint that you like him or if you are the guy erm find out from someone if she likes you. (not sure what sex you are as it does not state lol).

 

Jon

[yeawutever]

Usually it would be the girl flirting with him and dropping hints that she likes him or the guy is sick of tired of being shy and not doing anything about it.

[Luke Skywalker]

Generally, I am a shy person when it comes to girls, but I will say, if the resolve is strong enough, then I'd likely go through with it. Sometimes I will pray and ask God to help me ask someone I like out. Seriously.

 

I put an online profile on an internet site with a profile premised on asking someone out if I sent out a smiley. Obviously, the internet is the easiest place for a shy guy to pick up a girl. I asked 30 girls out on that method a couple of weeks ago. The last person I asked out offline was in July 2003.

 

That one was a challenge. I wrote a letter to myself guaranteeing myself I will ask her out within 30 days by forcing myself, but I may ask her out voluntarily at any time prior to those 30 days. I determined I would not oogle or look at any other woman and just focus on this one girl during this time, and if I looked at any woman, I would tear up that letter, which represented a commitment. I asked her out within seven days of the compliation of that letter.

[jordan_2]

please don't drop hints and stuff, at least from a guys point of view lol

 

you don't know how confused we (guys) get about those "hints", we are always in the "i'm-not-too-sure-she-likes-me" mind set so when you drop hints (unless they're explicit) we kind of get that, "oh no, she's just treating me like a good friend, nothing more"

 

for you girls who are trying to hook up with a shy guy, plain and simple....ask him out!

[Jonboy582]

please don't drop hints and stuff, at least from a guys point of view lol

 

you don't know how confused we (guys) get about those "hints", we are always in the "i'm-not-too-sure-she-likes-me" mind set so when you drop hints (unless they're explicit) we kind of get that, "oh no, she's just treating me like a good friend, nothing more"

 

for you girls who are trying to hook up with a shy guy, plain and simple....ask him out!

 

Agreed 100% I get SOO confused its unbelievable one of these things other people can tell but you yourself can't. Then you get the other guys who take anything as a symbol that a girl is interested even if they are not so either way you can't win by dropping hints. So have two options.

 

1. Ask him out

2. Either you or someone else tell him you like him

 

Jon

[Prenkle]

What will spur a shy guy to ask someone out?

 

Hmm...I'd say it all depends on how strongly the shy guy feels about the girl.

 

If you meet someone that you have very strong feelings for, you will ask her out regardless of what fears you have about rejection. This is because the fear of losing her or missing an opportunity is worse than the fear of being rejected. If you can't muster the courage to ask her out, then you don't like her enough.

 

That could be a bad sign because it usually takes more courage to stay in a relationship then to get in one.

 

But all things equal, have faith in yourself and in others. Didn't someone once say life expands/ constricts according to how much courage you have?

[RayF]

Theres also another posibility that no ones mentioned yet (other than Prenkle who was on the same page as me). He may be shy, but maybe he's not interested in you?

 

I'm still on the shy side, a bit, but i used to be REALLY shy and there were a few girls who liked me, i knew it, but never aked them out because even though i liked them as friends etc. i was not interested in them romantically.

 

The one plus to being a guy, shy or not, since girls expect you to make all the moves, at least if you're not interested in someone you don't have to and that potential awkward situation is avoided.

[Budman]

I tend to go with the no hints wagon.

 

* * * *, at one point I thought a girl was telling me she didn't like me when she was hinting at liking me.

 

Honestly (no offense), but sometimes you're hints suck.

 

It's like what the heck, hitting me is flirting I didn't understand that for awhile, ohh and apparently making fun of me is flirting too. Go figure I didn't get that one for a long time.

 

I remember the one time, a girl came up to me, and said "Hi, you're cute as a doll." I responded, "What the **** you callin me a doll for, I ain't no stinkin doll do you see a string comin outta my butt?." and I stormed off, now with my new acquired knowledge I realize the girl was just complementing me, or may have been interested.

 

Hints and such can be taken in many different ways.

 

Now, I just assume all things like that as perverse, and it works well. For example a female friend wants me to take a Judo class with her, I just said, "You're wanting to have your hands all over me aren't you?"

 

Anyway, don't hint be straight forward.

 

Ok, same question as the other guys. Why can't you ask him out.

 

Anyway, Here are some ideas.

 

Sit by the shy guy

 

talk to the shy guy

 

Every moment you are near him, or can be near him. Talk to him. Eventually he'll get comfortable talking to you.

 

You're gonna have to force it somehow.