can u have a relationship with a guy if....

[steff]

ok, well ive told part of my story in another post, but i'll update.

 

ive found a guy, but his moving away so i dont know if it will last, and we are not actaully going out... but anyway besides the point... ive finally started having sex after rape, now the thing is, i faint when having sex now because of it... my teeth go all tingerly and so do my arms and hands, i cant see or focus on anything, i start shaking really really really violently and cant get up for about 15 minutes later.... so as u can imagin its pretty much a nightmare for me to even be with a guy sexually....

 

so my question is:

 

can i have a relationship with a guy, a emotional relationship without sex, because i cant deal with it, and my theorpest is helping me through it all... im scared that if i find another guy, he wont understand the way that francis does (francis understands completely because his done med school and psychology and all that sort of stuff and has deal with friends in this situation, so he knows whats going on) but im scared that a new guy wont, and will just brake up with me once i have trusted him enough to open myself enough and be with him fully.... and he realises that he wont get much from me.... i really want to feel loved and be loved by a guy but i know i wont get that, if i dont give the guy what he wants....

 

what do i do?

[Momene]

Some blokes are understanding but we're not all. Lots of couples have differing sex drives and cope.

 

Good luck.

[the yang to the worlds yin]

are you sure it's not a seizure?

[tylercdurden2004]

Yeah some guys are understanding but a lot are not. I think at 18 you should spend a long time healing yourself you need it after such a traumatic experience. I myself would have no problem being wiht a girl with past issues of sexual abuse etc. But you need to be able to deal with yourself before you can truly deal with anybody else. Theres lots of single guys out there and at 18 youve got a good 10 years before you may need to settle down. Do the important stuff and take care of yourself first, its all you truly have. Be positive as much as possible and the rest will fall in to place.