how bad is it really?

[blink_guy]

so heres hte question

how bad is it really to ask someone out on msn?

i was just wondering because i get a lot of really good chances to do it on msn but in person it never happens...

thanks in advance

[AwdreeHpburn]

OK - so what I get from that ques is that it IS indeed bad, you're just looking for the degree??

 

Why IS it bad?

[SilverManic]

Personally I would take time to get to know someone on msn, but I wouldn't ask them out over it. It's a communication device but not a tool to hide behind. But I know lots of people that have so it's not bad 'parsee' but I wouldn't personally do it.

[Superfreak]

Well it might not necessarily be "bad" per se, but it is definitely less effective. Anyone familiar with the "milgram experiments" (sp?) knows that people are more likely to agree to something if you ask them in person to there face. Moreover online it's easy to have the other person misunderstand, or for you to just generally f*&k up the point you're trying to make. If you ask in person there's a far less chance misunderstanding.

 

If you're having difficulty getting the person you're after alone, maybe you could use msn to arrange a meeting like i.e "I need to talk to you a bit tomorrow, do you think you could see me after english class by my locker", but asking for a date you should give it the personal touch and do it to her/his face.

 

I know it takes alot of confidence and is a bit scary asking someone out to there face, but it has a much better chance of succeeding and the other person will often respect you more for it.

 

Good luck.

[k2004myway]

It depends on the situation. For the most part, it's taboo. However, my office mate is now in serious relationship (ready to propose) with a young lady and their contact started via MSN (work for the same company) while he was overseas. One day, as they were chatting on MSN, he asked her if she'd like to go to a place one day where they could talk in person, away from work (and other people). She consented and now they're about ready to marry.

[Kevin T]

Well it might not necessarily be "bad" per se, but it is definitely less effective. Anyone familiar with the "milgram experiments" (sp?) knows that people are more likely to agree to something if you ask them in person to there face. Moreover online it's easy to have the other person misunderstand, or for you to just generally f*&k up the point you're trying to make. If you ask in person there's a far less chance misunderstanding.

 

Ah, a fellow psyc student! lol

 

Anyway, I think it'd be best to ask the person out in person, if you can. If you can't, then the phone is still better. If you can't, then I guess you have to bite the bullet and go for e-mail/messenger communique.

[puccie08]

if a guy asked me out on msn i would be disappointed b/c that means that he doesnt even have the curage to say it to my face. make and effort and ask her out in a spacial way that she will remember. show and prove to her how much u want her to be urs, be romantic.

[ladeedah]

I would be a bit turned off if the guy asked me out on a date msn....I would feel that it was a bit disrespectful like what? I'm not wortha phone call? Dude! Pick up the phone and call her! Start this off on the right foot!

[Markers]

c'mon. You're afraid of rejection. If you actually go and ask her out in person, and she doesn't like you, it's not bad. People will think "ok he had guts to ask! wow!" However, if you ask her out on msn, and you get rejected, everyone will go like "ok what a wuss didn't have the nerve to ask her out in person, no wonder she didn't go out with him.." Also she might think that way too! She might not like guy not having enough courage to ask out in person. There's one situation only when I would recommend asking out in even email or phone (or msn): If that's the only way to contact her (like you know eachother from school and it's 6 month holiday or something and you see nowhere else..)

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

I think at least 3 of my past relationships have started with them asking me out over MSN and I said yes.

 

I dont think asking is the problem, as espeically for shy people it can be a less awkward way. However, you gotta be careful you dont just start using it as a substitute for any tricky conversations you really ought to be having face to face later on in the relationship.