He said he wanted to end it but couldn't HELP!

[Goldie]

I really need your help on this one.

 

My boyfriend of a year told me last night he wanted to end it but couldn't. He admitted he'd been avoiding me for a month. And said 'we' just didn't feel right. And that he had always been a loner. But also felt angry because felt he can't talk to me and tell me things like this. He also said sorry because he was confused and didn't know what to think. And said that he'd changed his mind that he thought it would be me who ended it first. And that actually he was thinking of it...

 

And why? Because since I moved out of his house in January we've been having the same arguments every weekend about my insecurities. How I think he doesn't love me, how he doesn't pay me enough attention and he HATES talking about us. He just wants us to be chilled and fun and enjoying each other's company.

 

He doesn't show his feelings much and he hates talking about relationships so it doesn't help my confidence much which adds to my insecurities and we go round and round in circles.

 

My heart is breaking because a month ago we nearly broke up and I said it wouldn't happen again (ie. Me going off on one and having a go at him!) But it happened on friday and ever since he's been thinking of ending it. I'm so angry with myself for losing it because I was doing so well and really thought we were on the mend. But realising he's felt uncomfortable and that he's been waiting for it to happen again has broken my heart.

 

What do I do? We seemed to sort a bit out last night, even though he was avoiding me at this party.. And I went home with him and slept with him before going to work this morning. When I left he was still asleep and I don't know where I stand.

 

What should I do? Do I give him some space and just let him come to me instead of pursuing him? Or should I carry on trying to make him see that I am and will be the person he fell in love with. And SO SO want to make us work. Because I love him so much.

 

Please help xxx

[togu]

u know the cause why he wants to end is miss communication, U've to talk with him seriously if he wants!!! give him some space dat he would choose something... If he will turn u down, u know what u have to do, No single fish in the ocean!!!! I know this feeling it's because he is the first one for u!!! Open ur eyes!!! and u have to move on!!! That's the way it is!!!

[Goldie]

Thank you for your thoughts. I wish it was as easy as that.

 

I have so many things spinning around in my head and all I can think of is him because he truly is wonderful. That's not a pathetic statement, it's just the truth.

 

I've driven him away with the fear of getting hurt and just caused all too much misery in the end.

 

It's not easy going out with someone who doesn't want to talk. And is only interested if you pretend everything's okay.

 

How can a partnership work out like that?