i need to break up, Please help

[dpressedone89]

hey everyone, long time no post. any way ive been with this girl now going on 6 months, and she is absolutely crazy about me. its scary sometimes. i want to break up because it doesnt feel right im just not happy with the relationship. ive tried before with horrible results, she says if i ever leave her shell hurt herself or worse. i want to break up but i dont know how. shes a great friend but i dont want to be with her at least not at this point in my life, any advice? pplease help

-stitches

[DN]

You are just going to have to tell her that the relationship is not working for you and that you want to break up. Do not be blackmailed into staying by any threats of hurting herself. But if you think she is serious then you should tell her parents.

 

This will be hard for you to do but there is no easy way to break up with someone. Don't stay with her for the wrong reasons.

[NJRon]

You can't control someone else. the longer you stay with her the worse it will get. She is emotionally blackmailing you, and it's not right. You need to do what you need to do and she needs to think for herself.

[Mrocza]

I agree with the others.

 

Don't be threatened into staying with her. If you think she could seriously harm herself, tell someone else close to her.

[MR]

Just be kind but firm also. It's a terrible thing but by not following your heart you are cheating both of you.

[Diggitydave]

Yes, sit down with her parents and tell them. Then you need to leave. If she threatens to kill herself if you leave, that is not healthy. You need to sit down with her family, without her, explain the situation and then explain to her while she's home with her parents but you're not there. Like if you plan on breaking up with her you need to make sure she is with her family at that moment. Remember, people do stupid and crazy desperate things over emotions. Chances are she really doesn't want to kill herself, it's just she feels so low about herself that she needs you to complete her (i've been through it) and without you telling her who she is and giving her approval of herself, she would feel lost. She most likely does care about you a great deal, and maybe loves you, but she needs to be whole in herself without you.

 

This is all based on my past situations, obviously yours is different. But i speak from experience when I say anyone who feels that their life is over without someone else (i have in the past) feels horribly about themselves deep down.

 

Don't judge this girl, make her feel inferior, or disrespect her. She most likely has a very very low self image and you complete her image by making her feel whole because in her head (if this guy is with me, i must be somethin special). If you walk away, that thought leaves too and that's all she has right now. Be kind and loving to her and talk to her family. Don't lead her on at the same time either.