How do you get over her?

[Casket]

Here it is, 3 months on. And i still cant get her out of my head. What in the hell do i need to do to make the pain go away?? I mean i actually thought of sending her something for valentines day while i was at the gym. The gym is normally my sanctuary, somewhere i can go and be at peace and not have a care in the world, but she has invaded that too!

 

I dont think ill ever get over her

[PassionatePices]

Hi Casket

 

I'm sorry your going through this!

 

Wish i the answers you seek.

 

I don't know if this helps but this is the advil for my "mind" at the moment.

 

I rearranged the furniture in my house it takes my mind off how she laid around.

Changed everything from moving pictures around and added colorlighting.

 

Put a new tile floor in my kitchen and painted the closets too.

 

The hardest for me was the bedroom but i moved around what i could in their but could not really do much due to the size of the room. I did however throw out all the pillows and bought new sheets and added an area rug.

 

It looks new and different and to be honest it was not my intention.Along the way i just found things to do to keep me busy and my mind off her.

 

I can't even begin to tell you what a blessing in disguise it was. It's me now with a fresh start.

 

I still think about her but not like i did before.I found myself in those calm states of rearranging the house that the relationship hit me in areas i overlooked.

 

I'm not hard on myself ,blame myself etc. and feel pretty good no where near 100% but it's been days since i cried.

 

I know what your feeling and believe me it's hard but it does get better.

 

You sound like a health conscious guy and going to the gym is great. I have been boxing since i'm 12 it's a great release. Works wonders on the mind for me .

 

Is there a sauna in your gym ? If so , I find 15-20 minutes leaves me level headed.

 

Call your friends ,family daily.I'm catholic and i have a pretty good relationship with my priest. This is what i've been doing.

 

Did she join your gym?

 

If she did don't change your schedule cause cause you know it will only throw your body off.Thus affecting how you will feel too.

 

Or change gyms if you like.

 

Focus on your sets and play some "Rage against the Machine" or Metallica and block her out.

 

I guess all in all i'm trying to say is Don't neglet you!

 

Be good to yourself Casket!

 

I'm rooting for you!

 

Ciao For Now

[1824blue]

Don't beat yourself up, but also really try to take an active effort not to let your self wallow in your misery. You obviously still need to get things and thoughts about her out of your system and some people take longer to detoxify then others.

 

You know on a Mac computer there is a little trash can on the bottom right corner and everytime you put something in there it crumples all up. Well each time a thought of her, or a memory pops into your head interrupt yourself say trash it and send it to the trash can.

 

If you have to walk around saying trash it for an hour straight you will but eventually you will be ride of it all.

 

Just a thought.

[Casket]

Thank you both for your kind responses. This forums is so great and has helped me through many a hard time.

 

I am glad to hear you are doing better passionate. I am very healthy conscious and know alot about body building. I am currently bulking and getting in 4000 calories a day and going to the gym 4 days a week. I find it takes my mind off things... until recently.

 

I know it will take time, but im selfish right now and i want it to be over. I want to move on with my life.

 

I will try hard. 1824blue i do not have a mac but i will apply the same principle. If i think of her i will do something immeditaly to take my mind off it. I wish i had some 80lb DB's i could press whenever i think of her!

 

Thanks again

[PassionatePices]

Holy snikes! 80lb DB's?

How many inches are your arms man? Damn , I just wondering how massive you are in size.

 

4000 calories are you eating now? lol

 

Take care Casket

[sukerbut]

it will come with time...now that i am in my fourth month i realized..that i did nothing wrong...sometimes peope are good for each other only for a short period of time..i firmly believe mine thought she wanted a relationship with me..then got bored after her love meter became full...it took a long time for me to realize that i did nothing wrong...i eman we all make mistakes, but nothign differnet than any otehr relationship...its all about timing and love..you cant have love and not have timig i know iw as on the sides of both spectrums..the key is to focus on yourself and getting you back..rejection from a lovedone is very tough and thats why we become so weak and fragile...its not you it me!! well thats the truth..you did not change as a person, they did..and once you accept the fact that it was not you, but just the circumstances broke you apart then and only then will you be at piece with yourself. unless you cheated , beat or verbally abused..then it was nt your fault..she fell in love with you. but due to unfortunate circumstances...life, career, outside influnces (family , guys, and immaturity) they decided they just did not want it any more..thats fine ..Its ok ..get on with your life and start living it..MOVE FORWARD

[octopus]

Casket, you can't fast forward unfortunately. You have to face all emotions that surface and hurt you. You have to cry everytime you feel like it. Then one day, after many swings, ups and downs, you feel that it's really not worth crying anymore. It's really not worth wasting another minute.

 

If you don't believe me, read my posts since December. It's only Feb 14th today, and I've decided I'm not giving my ex one more minute of my life, unless he works hard to earn it. It does hurt, but you need to move on.

[Casket]

Holy snikes! 80lb DB's?

How many inches are your arms man? Damn , I just wondering how massive you are in size.

 

4000 calories are you eating now? lol

 

Take care Casket

 

My arms are approx. 16". Yes 4000 calories a day with approx 250g of protein each day.

 

I just never thought this would be so hard. I mean we made plans for children, marrage and everything else under the sun, she was my first. I dont want to give her time in my life, but she keeps on invading it. I will try to think bout how its not my fault but hers and not let her into my life again. I will try...

 

Thank you again. I dont know how to ever thank the members of this ledge that bring me closer to closure each time...