Once a cheater always a cheater?

[digitaldiva]

Please go ahead and call me an idiot before beginning to read this.

I'm think that if you're once a cheater you're always a cheater. I met a man and he had a girlfriend. He didn't plan on leaving her but he had no problem cheating on her with me. The broke up then we were together. We broke up and they are toghether. And he still wants to see me on the side.......

 

once a cheater always a cheater....

[babycristy456]

No your not an idiot for thinking that way...but its not correct. This guy is just a jerk that wants everything but can't have it. Drop him and drop him fast, he's playing games with you, and his other poor girlfriend. I think that people can change from being cheaters...but you just cant change with the person that u cheated on, because once they forgive you, you kinda take advantage of that and may do it again knowing that you can get away with it.

Just stay away from cheaters, find a guy that's yours only! One that you don't have to worry about sharing him with another woman!

I hate those cheaters!!!

[glassbell]

Once a cheater, always a cheater is a generalization, and is not always true. In this case with this man though, you're experiencing the proof right now.

 

He obviously just wants the best of both worlds, and is not able to choose. If he does choose for you in the end, you probably won't be completely happy either because you'll always wonder.. is he being faithful this time..?

 

Try focusing on your other interests in life and take your distance from him for a while.

 

good luck

~glassbell

[faeriechyld]

I do not agree with this statement as I do believe a person can change, but like babycristy said, a person cannot change while still with the person they cheated on. In addition, I believe that a person can only change when they WANT to, and I don't believe this guy wants to. And why should he? He cheated on his g/f with you and then you two got together and now she took him back but he feels he still has you as a back up. Now is the time to set him straight. One day this guy is going to get a taste of his own medicine, or at least end up alone. As the saying goes, when you play with fire, you're going to get burned. And he is playing dangerous. One day his on again g/f will smarten up and dump him.

You need to move on now. There are plenty of other guys out there who will not cheat on you and you deserve one of them!! Feel sorry for the poor girl he's dating now as you realize he's probably cheating on her with someone else. Maybe once he is left in the dust by all girls involved he'll grow up and stop playing these childish games.

And next time, don't do anything with a guy you know is spoken for, you're hurting his g/f, but most importantly you're hurting yourself. Realize that if he'll cheat on her, chances are, he may cheat on you. Only with a completely new and different person could he have a hope to change. Good luck.

[charmed]

God I hate cheating !! sooooooooo much.

 

Trust is a core foundation - it has been abused - stay away from that guy or it will happen again !! He may give up cheating, but I agree with baby aswell, probably not with either you or the other girl - the respect is gone.

 

I will say that you cheated on the other girl with him - that may have sent out a message to him that it's acceptable - did you know about her at the time? I did that once (well I got involved with someone reguarly over a few months), and I felt so bad - ashamed that I would do it to someone else. I will not do that again.

 

Focus on making youself happy in life and you will attract a man worthy of your monogomy and trust !!

 

Good luck,

 

~ Charmed ~

[secret_agent_man]

I sort of disagree due to personal experiences...

Not that it's all wrong, but in my case I cheated once (I know it's no better, but it wasn't a rational decision I made, it was an accident I let happen).

 

I learned so much from myself that I have grown enormously from that. Three years later, I don't have any little bit of urge to be with anyone else... It's just not in me. I've decided what I want.

 

Charmed, you know my situation and how I feel about her... I guess it's a whole different situation, but believe me, I changed.

 

S.A.M.

[charmed]

U see, I definitely knew what I was doing then - in fact he was in the next room many of the times we were together ! Not proud, not at all....

 

C.