I need some advice

[JSaint]

I am going to try and make this short. I dated a man for 8 weeks, both of us felt that we had finally found "the one" We started getting alot of talk from our friends concerning marriage and babies, needless to say it felt alot like pressure. We broke up three weeks ago when he called to talk and when he was stumbling around with what he wanted to say I just asked "do you not want us to date anymore, it's ok" to which he replied "not right now." So that was that, of course then I find out that he has been asking about me every day and that he had no intention of us breaking up that night, he just wanted to talk. So I sent him a letter, addressed the pressure issue and told him what I would like to happen (slow down, date like normal people...) I mailed that letter on 11/30. Oh yeah, and he doesn't check the mail but like once a week (guys can be silly) so my problem is I haven't heard anything from him. He is not the kind of guy to not respond to anything, a phone call, email or letter. So I have no idea if he even got the letter, I am going crazy wondering about it. I have no idea what to do now and I need advice, I have little to no patience and I can't stand this. Please help!!

[RayKay]

8 weeks is very early to be talking about marriage and babies, for most people at least. That's still the honeymoon stage after all!

 

May I ask how old the two of you are?

 

My sense is the pressure did get to him, he may not have intended to call it off, but when it came down to it, he realized he needed to do so, when you gave him the opening.

 

I would not contact him again, you sent him the letter, leave it at that. If he does not contact you, realize you can't force anything and work on healing. If he wants you, he knows where to find you. I know you might be imagining a postal truck fell in a ditch with your letter, but likely not the case.

[sweetheart230]

Personally, I say call him or send him an email. mail is rather unreliable. calling him is the best option. it may have been lost in the mail. either way, you will get a direct response and know where you stand if its really bothering you that much.

 

just my opinion.

 

What RayKay says is very true too. And I'm not in the best position to give advice to be honest. He does know where to contact you if he wants to. i'm just wondering why you elected to send him a letter. it seems like an odd way of communicating these days. but i guess if a guy wants to talk to you, he will find a way.

[JSaint]

I sent the letter because he wasn't checking his email anymore (he only used it to talk to me) and I wanted him to be able to reread the letter at will and soak it in. I just really didn't expect not to hear from him, it doesn't make sense. And not only that how can you go from "I'm falling in love with you" to not talking...and the feelings were genuine, I know him that well. So where did they go?

[JSaint]

No I am not imagining a postal truck in a ditch but instead an error in the address, he lives in a condo and the mailing addresses are weird. I am afraid I got the address wrong. I am 30 and he is 24, he approached me and the age was never an issue with us.

[catgirl82]

call him, dont play games- if you 2 care about eachother who cares?

 

i agree, snail mail is way too unreliable