Erase the Memories

[tiki]

There are wounds time could never heal; the ones that deeply scarred your soul and spirit; the ones that forever changed your life.

 

I've forgotten what we fought about, I've forgotten some special dates, I've even forgotten some of our moments…but I can never seem to forget him. He's always on my mind- as if he lives inside my brain. I've let him go…but he's still not out of my life and I desperately need him to be.

 

I hardly ever let my feelings out about this anymore. I brush them off because I am aware of the conclusion and the heart break that comes with that realization. I'm afraid that I will live with him forever…but only in memory.

 

Love was the one thing I thought I knew…but I've been impaired. Now I have no idea whether I still believe in it. The only love I've known is feeling happiness despite the pain. Is it really that? Am I on the right track or do I have it all wrong?

 

17 months. It's been 17 months since we broke up and he's still the only one for me. I look for him in guys I meet at parties or anywhere.

 

I've changed so much since then, and I'm sure we've become pieces to two completely different puzzles... but it's not over for me despite all that. Perhaps I need revenge or closure. I want him to see how much I've changed and grown and see what he's been missing out on (as if that would make me feel better). We've been down that road before and it wasn't the closure I was looking for.

 

Maybe there is no closure. Maybe I simply have to live with it.

[Pebek]

Tiki - I'm completely with you on this.

20 months. It's been 20 months since she broke up with me and she's still the only one for me. I look for her in other girls.

Sorry I can't help you but that's how I feel. I only know that the pain does lessen, but will it ever go away completely?

[gemz]

I also know how you feel. It's heart breaking.

 

I'm sorry I can't offer you advise, but I do know what you are going through. Stay strong.

[chaos]

It's been 6 weeks for me. While it's still painful, I don't want her back. You have to realize the pain that these people have put us through. I'm willing to bet none of us deserved it. Most of us are good caring people and our ex's took that for granted, threw it back in our faces. The "right" person would NEVER do that! If you still think they're the only one for you and you still compare everyone you meet to them, then you havn't let go yet. Get angry at them, if it's been 17 or 20 months, get even more angry, because they're still monopolizing your life and they've no right to do that anymore!

 

Best of luck!

[Hawk]

chaos - sounds like good advice to me - if they were so right, so good, so perfect - would they ever do this to you. If they knew how much it tears at your soul and puts you at the bottom of a pit that you never think you will get out, then they never would have done it to you - they would have found anyway that they could to work on the relationship to get it right.