Totally over?...Maybe not!

[lady_android]

Hi there peolple..

I would like to share my problems with you guys. Ok, I've been in a 7-year relationship and my boyfriend broke up with me 4mos. ago. What's hurts me most is that it was after our ANNIVERSARY and before my BIRTHDAY! He told me that his feelings continue to lessen and he wouldn't want to lie to me anymore. 1 week after the break-up I found out that he has another girl! Then one of his friends confide to me that they've been together even before our break-up. OUCH! in short, he two-timed me. Oh and just for the record, he did it to me twice already. For the first two months I was able to recover from it but as time passes, I'm starting to realize that its not very easy to get over him. There are times that he would call me up and say that he misses me...I would really want to forget about him but I'm very close to his family and to some of his friends too. He's the only person I've ever loved...But my mind's been tellin me to let him go because my friends told me that he's not worth it. I do miss him a couple of times but I guess everybody passes through that stage...The thing is, I'm really bothered..because he would call me up and text me sometimes which I don't want him to do. i still love him, I'm still hurtin'...everytime I talk to him I just get disappointed because I always say to him that I've always wished him well so I'm hoping that he'll be doing the same for me but we would be tellin me that he still loves me and that he misses me so much, you know, those kinds of stuff! I think that he shouldn't be tellin me those things because it would be very hard for me to move on. He just won't let me be..and until now he hasn't admitted to me yet of what he did and I haven't got any apologies from him too, instead he would blame me for being so jealous and unappreciative. Its like his defense mechanism for his guilt. I don't know what else to do, his attitude is starting to irritate me and I'm losing my grip...HELP!!!

[Heretic]

Yikes!!

 

This is a really bad situation. Honestly, this guy is some kinda evil. First he cheats on you twice, then the third time he won't even admit to it and he tries to dump blame on you? That's bad enough then he does everything can can to make sure you stick around even after the break-up?

 

Let me see if I can figure out what's going on. IMHO I think that he know how good of a catch you are and he doesn't want to lose you. However he also doesn't want to pass up everything that looks twice at him. He's playing games with your emotions and he thinks he's got you where you can't get away. He might even joke about it with his friends. Honestly this guy isn't good news tell him next time he tells you he misses being with you, "I'm sorry, it's over. I don't know why you bother even trying to get me back. You messed up and you're going to regret it." or something along those lines... be firm. Then proceed to find a guy more suited to you. You've been with him for 7 years, of course you're going to feel like he's the only guy for you at times... but that couldn't be further from the truth. There are plenty of guys better then him out there who are probably waiting for a girl like you.

 

Good luck with your ex and Happy Hunting.