Dealing with the end of 'friends with benefits'

[keye]

Hi guys,

 

My situation isn't a traditional "break-up" - I didn't know where else to post this. Nonetheless, I would love any kind of advice that you would have for me. Please bear with me as the post may be quite long.

 

This is what I posted on another message board on October 8th.

 

 

 

This is what I posted on October 10th:

 

 

 

And this is what I posted on October 29th:

 

 

 

And these are my feelings today, on October 31st:

 

Was breaking NC a bad idea? I've been text messaging him on and off for the last five days (purely platonic messages), since breaking NC and seeing him, and he's been on my mind constantly (again!). I know we're not supposed to be together at the moment and that this is for the best, but I can't help longing for him. I'm not sure whether I miss HIM or whether I miss the IDEA of him - am I just lonely? I feel so confused. All this time, has it just been me confusing physical attraction with emotional attachment? Is it the fact that he's been my one and only lover? Will this feeling go away when I meet someone new? I don't know whether what I'm feeling is REAL or not. How does one know? And how do I avoid sinking back into the place from where I thought I'd escaped just a few days ago? HE GOES AWAY IN TWO WEEKS! And as far as I know, he still has a thing with that other girl.

[Zerohero]

Friends with benifits is not a good idea.......