Losing the One You Love.

[Angelus]

How do you cope when

The one you love is with somebody else

And there's nothing you could do about it

How do I deal with

The fact that you had a chance

But you chose to turn away for your career

I gotta take it though it's heartbreakin'

It's something that I had to do

But nobody said that it would hurt so bad

So how do I live...how do I deal without you.

Lyrics by Frankie J.

 

I just lost the one I love and right now I'm finding it hard to deal with it man. Ladies, I could use a voice of reason advice you can give will be greatly appreciated. After being with her for nearly 3 years its hard imagining life without her. How do you deal with it? How do you accept it? Hwo do you live with it?

[Satin]

First Angelus..I LOVE that song

 

Second.....we need more info on the breakup.....what happened?

[heloladies21]

Well if your ex just jumped to some other guy then she never gave a **** about you anyways.

 

If not, break ups are hard, the hardest thing to deal with in the world for me. Most important thing to remember is that none of this is your fault (unless you did something really bad like cheat), so don't blame yourself. And if she did something wrong, it's perfectly ok to blame her. Even if she just decided that she doesn't want the relationship with you any more for no apparent reason, it's ok to be mad b/c she hurt you and you have the right to be upset.

 

Best way to deal with it is to do No Contact in the most strict sense. In that time your emotions will cool down and you will be able to deal with the situation better. Stay busy as hell and start talking to other chicks. It will distract some of the heartache and you just might stumble upon someone else. If she contacts you and starts trying to force her way back into your life, then you can decide what you want to do with her, but it can't be easy to get you back. Otherwise be glad that you got rid of someone who never truly loved you.

[Angelus]

Well our breakup is really over us heading in two different directions. I have my own business and I'm branching out into a lot of things right now that has my days pretty much booked out. She's going to university to study medicine and well things just fell apart so quickly. If I negelected my dreams I'd regret it and now that I'm making my dreams come true via my company I wonder if I'd regret it.

 

I'd give her the world man she's my inspiration, my everything, now I don't even feel inspired to succeed now and it's scary. What do I do?

[heloladies21]

Relax, all your feelings are normal. You sound like a bright kid, you'll do what's best for you in the long run. Make sure you give this time so you can let your emotions cool down and keep them in check. People make the worst mistakes when they let their emotions control them. Just stay focused on your things and everything will become clearer.

[Angelus]

Thanx man I really appreciate it.

[btbt]

This is a tough choice -- career or relationship. But the question is, why does pursuing your professional dreams (for both of you) preclude having a relationship with each other? In an ideal relationship, both of you would support each others' professional choices and work. Yet, life is complicated -- maybe there is a matter of geographical location (are either of you moving?) or being too busy, which you allude to. But if your professional goals make you too busy to have a relationship with this woman -- a woman you say you have the deepest feelings for -- then you probably aren't in a position to have any relationship. I guess what I'm saying is that it seems odd that there would be a job where you have NO time for your partner. Or, maybe you guys are not being understanding enough of each others job needs. Perhaps it need not be an all or nothing situation. If you find that it is, then there must be a deeper issue, i.e. if you really love someone, you will knock off a few hours early from work to spend time with them.

[Angelus]

That would be easy but I'm always on the Go, she's working from 9-5 and I'm working from 5am to 12am. I gat a business to run and I'm trying to start my record lable so my days are just crammed. Now I talk to her each chance I can and if I could spare a minute with her I take it. She'll be heading to Canada soon and I'll be here in Bahamas making something of myself. I'm very ambitious and you'd have to kill me to make me quit I mean I'm still down with making my relationship work bc when she comes back in the summer, she'll have nothing to worry about bc I wanna take care of her. She's my queen man.