o no tell me i didnt

[nosoul]

okay last night was my brother had a party well not really he had 4 guys over and they're all a year younger and they're all friends with my boyfriend but my boyfriend wasnt there he is gone out of town.Any way last night i was laying down watching a movie and one of my brothers friends came in and stood by me for like 2 mins watching it so i said he could sit down and watch it and i meant like any where but he came over and laid in behide me and he put his arms around me and we just laid there. Do you guys think thats cheating i didnt do anything but lay there and i really needed that too since i havent had that for a week and i miss it but any way i m goin to tell my boyfriend when he gets home but is it cheating??

[Shadows Light]

A brief comfort hug between friends... no not cheating. Laying on the couch spoons... YEP.... Its a close shared intimacy.... you've crossed the line.

[SilverManic]

I sometimes when I'm really sad hug my brother because he's my best male friend who I tell everything but I think that might be slightly different because were family and there is no way anything would ever happen then. It's not technically cheating because you didn't kiss or do anything like that. Hugging friends is fine but it depends how your boyfriend sees it. He might think nothing of it. Then again he could be really angry with it.

[darkblue]

I don't think it's 'cheating' as such, but you should tell him. Honesty is the best policy. I don't think you've done anything incredibly wrong though.

 

He might be upset at first; but he'll cool down.

[Cynder]

I wouldn't say you cheated.

 

I used to have a guy frined who I got cuddly with on a regular basis. My bf at the time knew and didn't care.

 

If your bf is upset, then tell him how sorry you are and that you won't do it again. You cuddled, it's not like you slept with the guy.

[darkblue]

Something to think about - If it was reverse roles and your boyfriend had done that with another girl. How would you feel? Would you want to know? How would you react?

 

think about those questions and make a decision based upon 'if he has a right to know' or 'if it would be in his best interests to know'.

[Darkshadow]

If your boyfriend is someone you adore, and hold close to you; hold in your heart. Then he is with you always, just not physically. He is with you in conscience (In your thoughts/Heart) - he can not see, and you are his eyes. You assume that he is not there so it is okay, but he is you see? Unless he is meaningless to you. But by the ways of your concern it shows you care, but I feel you should be discussing this with him first, whether it is cheating or not. If there is guilt then there is disloyalty. You know what is right; would you want one of your friends doing that to him, and him being okay with it?

--

Besides the point, it is not that big of a deal. Just don't let it elevate into a more depressing problem. You might want to think about his friend that did that to you, he is being a disloyal friend as well. He also may have some thoughts about you in ways he shouldn't, for you are not with him. If I were you I would get the friend that you did that with and talk with your boyfriend, all three together. Discuss it truthfully, and do not deny or hold back. How can it be bad if all you do is tell the Truth? Do not support any denial from his friend. Be true to who you care for. Lies wont do anything but numb and nurture the problems so they can secretly grow. Especially with remorse.

 

But if your boyfriend is not all that important, at least as much as I'm crediting him to be. Just go with the flow. You will learn one day.

 

Good luck, and don't get me wrong I'm not trying to build up your guilt.

I'm just trying to release the fear of the Truth. Embrace the Truth. Trust in the Truth that beats within you.

 

-Tony

[Hope75]

Monet Lisa is right.

 

If it's something you would do in front of your boyfriend and that you would feel fine telling him about, it's probably fine. My guess is you feel a little guilty about it and know you've crossed a line or you wouldn't be asking, so while the behavior isn't necessarily cheating by definition, it is definitely inappropriate when you have a bf already.