Kissing Question

[Mythica]

I haven't read the other posts, so this may be off topic to what they say...

 

I have a question for you... How do you let a guy know you want them to kiss you, without actually saying it? There are these two guys, diff relationships, far between, that I haved loved. One I knew for 4 years b4 going out with him, so that is how I knew that I loved him. But the one b4 him, there was the other one. I started to date him cuz he was cute. But he told me he loved me, freaked me out, but we continued to date. When he would say "I love you." I would just say "You too." But this was over the phone. And it was only after I broke him off cuz he moved away that I realized I love him too. But back to the point. I told the first one that I wanted to kiss him, and he told me he would kiss me. But on our last date, he never did. Then this last one, I dropped hints like crazy but he never did. But you see, he told me that he loves me, and I replied without hesitation. But he broke up with me yesterday. Said I was taking things too seriously. But yet he was the one who wanted to sleep with me. But I made it perfectly clear to him that I don't want to sleep with him. I told him that I wanted to talk about other things rather than how he was getting a hard-on while I was on the phone. He was always goofy and sweet. But once I started to date him, he talked of nothing else. He was always trying to arouse me, but it never worked. He played motzart by ear, and I told him that worked just so he would play it for me. He could play beautifully. He was always playing that keyboard. Oh boy could he play! But after he would play, he would ruin the moment by asking me if it worked. Okay, this is really long so I am gonna wrap it up. What is your advice?

[QTpie87]

Well about that guy saying you are taking things to seriously that was way messed up, you know? cause if he said he loves you that's serious. sounds to me like he's a player who only wants a little something.

 

As for the kissing, eh. Guys and reading girls, yeah right. I was almost dating a guy for around 4 months and then he finally asked me out and it took him 2 more months to kiss me. I would so be obvious about wanting to too. He would hold my hand but he wouldn't ever go in for the kiss. I think the only reason he found out that I wanted to kiss him was cause I told his friend to knock some sense into him and realize when I was being suggestive like that. so he told him to kiss me. he told me later he never knew I wanted him to kiss me and he was afraid to.

so I think us girls need to start being the kissers, not the kissies.

[kskm]

I also agree- guys are as nervous as girls sometimes- if not all. I think that girls need to be the ones to make the first move more often!

[arwen]

I think guys can be afraid to 'take a hint'- suppose she doesn't want to kiss? I am not saying you should ask for it explicitly, but you can try being a bit more obvious, why not stroking his chest, and standing close?

 

Or if you say goodbye the next time- lean in and give in a soft kiss (extend it a bit ) on the cheek. See if he tries to take the next step and 'promote' the kiss to the mouth

 

You don't want to sleep with him- so don't give too much if you know what I mean. I'd stay away from the belly and not press my entire body against his., to avoid him getting too enthusiastic. Take care you don't start kissing when you are already sitting on a bed- maybe look for a quiet romantic place that is just suited for a good long kiss.

 

Hope it helped!

 

Ilse.

[Mr. B]

I another one of those guys who doesn't take hints... nothing wrong with just asking or taking matters into your own hands.

[Desired1]

To be honest,

It is better for girls to make the first move.

Guys are usually concerned about how a female will react to being kissed and if it is unwanted or if the girl is going to slap him or hit him for being too forward and other things. It is better overall, in my opinion, if the girl makes the first move.

 

Also, you guys need to get over your fears. If you are going out with someone, you are supposed to be open with them and always be able to communicate. If you can't communicate to tell him/her that you want to kiss or don't want to kiss, then there are some issues already.

 

But, as much as I love guys, I have to admit...

They are very slow when it comes to picking up hints. To avoid all conflict, just lay your cards out on the table and speak your mind

Good luck

dez

[mdandrea]

That idiot that broke up with you wasn't worth it. Find someone who really loves you and when they say it, don't be scared, just look at how he treats you, if he cares for you, how you feel and what you want to do in your life then he loves you but if he says it to make you wanna sleep with him dump him on the spot and wait till he learns how to have true love, if he doesn't then it wasn't meant to be.