3 months and I am not over him...

[Sososad1983]

We met at work, started dating in april, it was “amazing”, at 34 and he is 40, hard to connect with someone especially when we both have a divorce under our belt. He broke up with me twice, first time over the fact that I am of andifferent religion and couldn’t move in with him without a ceremony, Two weeks later we both realised it was a mistake and got back together, only to be short lived and 6 weeks after that, after putting a brick wall between us, and me doing my best to keep him, he broke up with me again. I am hurt, hurt because I trusted him, and opened up to him, and he promised to cherish that. Back to work, it was akward at first, then we started talking again as what I can only

Assume He thought “as friends”, that lasted a week then I cut him off. I stopped talking to him, went full no contact for a good solid month, I knew I would not see him (training vacation etc), then I came back to work, he was there and he brought me a gift. It was something he got me

From

Vietnam...why was he thinking of me on his vacation? Anyways, back to being all friendly and stuff, and its been a week, now I am thinking ofcutting him off again, he’s too comfortable around me, we texted a little bit, but I think he does not want to open that door. I am just so confused....

[sputnik123]

Hi Sososad,

 

Sorry to hear you are going through this.

 

How long were you together in total? 3 months is not a long time post b/up, especially as there is still contact with him.

 

I think it would certainly help you to distance yourself from him as much as possible, even if you initially tell him that there does not need to be contact with him any more (except for anything work-related, where you can just be professional).

 

You should start to heal from this properly, then be able to start looking forwards more.

 

This forum will help, as many people are in the same boat.

 

Stay strong.

[SweetGirl28]

What religion is he? And what religion are you?

Two breakups ? Hmm......

He's trying to keep the friendship for a reason, and I'm thinking it's not a sexual one....

[DanZee]

Well, I'm not exactly sure what was going on in the relationship, but I think you need to be consistent in how you handle your ex boyfriend. Talking to him, cutting him off, then talking to him again and now thinking about cutting off contact again ... you're helping to create a lot of confusion on his part. He doesn't know which version of you he's going to run into. Also you're actually creating more attention to be drawn to yourself by this behavior. Since you're both at work, I think you can at least say hello to him if you run into him, but just keep it short and formal. Keep it consistent.