Caught girl sleeping w/ ex

[rickcarlisle]

What can I say? I seem to pick the really good ones. This girl and I were dating for about a month. I know enough about relationships to not date someone who is not over their ex. She told me everything about him... the fact that he just got out of jail, how he pushed her all the time, and how he cheated on her. SHe swore up and down she was over him. I was confident she was over him. We spent almost every day together and she would call me five times a day. She told me how she would give up everything except her child for me. Things were going great, not just on a sexual level. But then I noticed her ex's name on her outgoing call list. I asked her about it and she swore it was nothing. I told her we should not see eachother until she was over her ex. But she cried (tears and all) and said she really was over him, and that she was scared of losing me. Well... a week later I had a gut feeling something was going on. So one afternoon I decided to stop by her place. After knocking for a minute or two, her ex-boyfriend answers the door (as he's zipping up his pants). She was busted. Apparently, she told him I was some gay guy to just study with. He never knew I was in the picture, and vice versa. He was calm about it though. We both left her apartment, but then he wanted my phone number to hang out with me! LOL! I gave him my number in case he needed to talk, and to make sure there were no hard feelings. She text me later saying "Im sorry but I love him and will always love him. I'll never get over him and never will." Can you believe that? Just thought I'd share this with you all, maybe some of you can relate. What was she thinking? Well, she is only 20 yrs old. Some girls can be vicious liars.

[wlfpack81]

Women..blah lol

 

Sorry brob

[ForAnother]

Oh man, I hear ya about the lying. I loved a girl for 10 months and she lied to me the last 4 ofem... kinda sucked, but toughened me up. I am now with a girl that is ultra clingy (which I like) yet she is so honest sometimes that it kills me. Sometimes there are extremes... but I'd rather stay with my current for the truth than be backstabbed and hurt by a liar.

 

You can never really assume someone is over their ex... it never really happens in my opinion. *shrug* best you can do is roll the dice and see what kinda roll you get.

 

ForAnother

[rickcarlisle]

Yea, I definitely would rather be on the extreme you're on. At least you know your time won't be wasted. It just sucks that she was so heartless in the end. How can someone fake feelings like that? Sometimes I think some people enjoy lying.

[ForAnother]

Sometimes you THINK??? people who lie typically find some satisfaction. Its like when your talking about someone and they are right there in front of them, you entice them till they finally ask you what your saying and then keeping it from them is half the fun.

 

Liars never break lieing if they pass through into their 20's in my opinion... people either learn it early or learn it MUCH later, and slower.

 

I learned to stop lieing... I still lie, but to no extreme that it used to be.

 

i hate liars.

 

ForAnother

[c00kie]

everyone lies though. its when people lie about stuff that could hurt you that really pisses me off. i caught my ex a year ago and if i wasnt in public i swear i wouldve got violent...but lucky i didnt. i just got her back when she broke up wit him...wantd to get bak together.i said yes, got in her pants and let her catch me with someone else....mean i know but GOD it felt so good...but i dont think anyone else should do it. abit to mean

[Belinda]

MY GOD! WHat an absolute nut-case. I assure you not all women are like that.

Man.... Ive been in a similar boat myself, pain goes right through you. Especially when you never guessed before...

I hope your next partner will be LEAPS and BOUNDS better than this one (wouldnt be hard

[RayKay]

 

 

I would say not only is she not over her "ex" (obviously) but she has some serious emotional issues that you do not want to get involved with anyway.

 

Better you found out now then later, and I am positive you can only do much much better after this! Most women are NOT like this, so the odds are on your side. I think you know this when you said "some girls are vicious liars" so I hope you avoid the "some" in the future and find one of the great, honest ones

[rickcarlisle]

Damn... I hope I don't end up dating another girl like this one. You're right. She must have some real emotional issues. I really hope she eventually breaks out of this. She does have a 14 month old baby after all.

[Iceman26]

I would advise you to try for someone without any baggage next time. You are too young to be dating a girl with a kid.

 

Sorry that happened man, that sucks and I feel for you. At least you found out about this early on in the relationship.

[Elite]

Sorry to say but everybody has some kind of baggage!

 

You need to realize who you are and what you want out of life, and when you do the person that better fits you will come. There are a lot of people out there who lie, and the good ones are not only good at lying to you , but also themselves.

 

You have to take this experience and learn from it so you do not make the same mistake. You are still younge and you will meet a lot of really nice people and some not so nice, just figure out who to give your heart to and who not too.

 

I wish you luck and I am sorry this has happened to you!

[Iceman26]

What I said came out wrong, my bad. What I mean to say is that you are too young to be dating girls with kids. I agree that everyone has baggage of some sort.

[Elite]

You can not help who you fall in love with, weather they have kids or not. Everybody has their own opinion on the subject, all you can do is follow your heart and not close the door to someone just because they have children.

[Iceman26]

Sure you can help it. I closed it all the time.

[Cecelius]

I gotta side with Ice. I think (though I shouldn't assume) his point was that for a young man dealing with issues for the first time in life, it's VERY unwise for the OP to step into a situation with a child involved. Just as a person should control themselves from falling for an abusive SO, they also should keep the reins on in cases where its not the right time.