Not taking no for an ANSWER ANYMORE!

[hurtwou]

My boyfriend and I just broke up a few weeks ago, and he is the one who ended it....Ive been asking him why he did what he did, and he never answers me and says he doesnt want to talk about it, and everytime I bring something up about our relationship he tells me to leave him alone. I never take no for answer so Id keep asking him and he would make an excuse to hang up the phone, why doesnt he wanna talk about it? Please dont tell me to get over it, because like I said im not, so can you all give me advice on what to do, to make him tell me why he did the things he did?

[rosierizzle]

The reason he may not be telling you why is because he is ashamed. I felt this way when I first dumped my bf. I was really ashamed that I had hurt him and upset him. Don't push it too much, you have a right to know but remember he also has a right to privacy. Back off a bit and maybe become friends with him and then ask him again, he should feel more comfortable with telling you. Good Luck

[annie24]

Honey - do you really need to know every, last, little reason why he doesn't love you anymore? You really want him to spell out exactly why you aren't his dream woman anymore? Don't put yourself through the pain. He broke it off - move on, take him at his word.

[nosoul]

hey! you want to know why for closer right??? When i asked one of my ex's why. he asked me why i wanted to know, and what i said was i have a right to know,And he said i didnt ,and i said i did because i wanted to know what i wrong in that relationship what i could fix in so i wouldn't do wrong in my next realationship. So you do have right to know for your reasons and when he says i dont want to talk about then tell him just to tell you the reason/reasons and you'll stop bugging him about it.Or another way is what i did 2 months ago my boyfriend dumped and after he did so he blocked me on the computer and so the next day i called my friend to tell her about it and so she came over and called him and asked him why.So if you have a friend that is close/knows your ex then get her/him to call him and ask why.Or if your close/know one of ex's friends ask them why.I hope you get your answer.You should know.

[Nebular]

he might be afraid of how you'd take it. I mean he might be trying to spare your feelings, albeit he's not going about it the best way. I mean if it was just a few weeks ago and he broke up with you over another girl...that could be pretty painful to hear. I mean it'd come out sooner or later, but maybe he figures if he told you now, it'd really wreck you.

[DN]

Possible reasons:

 

He knows that what he says will hurt you

 

He may not want to appear shallow

 

He may think that if he tells you the reason you will try to persuade him that the problem can be fixed and he doesn't want to try.

 

He can't put the reason into words - he just isn't attracted to you.

[ShySoul]

He's probably ashamed of the situation or is hurting himself and doesn't want to deal with it. I understand the desire to know what happened, but if he is being uncooperative then you can't force it out of him. What you need to do is see that he has a hangup that he isn't ready to deal with, it's his problem not yours. You deserve someone better who is at least willing to talk things over with you instead of leaving you confused and hurt.

[annie24]

I really advise against "forcing an answer" out of him. In addition to the things that DN and ShySoul have brought up, I'd like to add, that he may lie to you just to shut you up. He may not want to tell you the real reason, so he'll just make up what he thinks you want to hear.

[ShyGuy444]

I agree with DN, so i just say it's best to move on, sorry