i'm extremely insecure with girls

[asdf]

Okay, well, as the title says, I'm very insecure with girls. Truth is, I'm good at attracting girls, it's easy for me, but I never can seem to take it further than that, just because I don't trust them.

 

I'm always constantly wondering about things like "what if she's just using me for an ego boost?", "what if she's just playing with me?", etc.

 

And I'm also very insecure if a girl has had a boyfriend before. I have no idea why, but I do want to be the first guy for a girl. I don't understand it myself, it's just a kind of male pride thing.

 

This line of thinking has kept me away from ever getting really intimate with a girl. I think I'm a very attractive guy, because I keep on attracting lots of girls, very attractive girls, even girls who had serious boyfriends already (which has disturbed me).

 

And the only way I've been able to be comfortable when having a girlfriend is when I don't really care about them that much. I focus on all their negatives, just so that if I ever lose them I won't feel bad.

 

And I've been like that up until a few weeks ago, I don't know why I did, but I decided to make myself vulnerable to a girl, and because she responded positively to me, I've suddenly realized what I've been missing out on. It was an overwhelming rush, it feltlike I had risked my life and barely survived.

 

Anyway, I do want to be able to be in a relationship with a girl that I'm not scared to like. I don't always envisioning the worst case scenarios, and end up doing nothing at all around a girl.

 

The way I made myself vulnerable around this girl was just a small gesture, but it had a huge effect on me. I guess it's kind of given me hope. But it's also scared me to death even more, because now I'm thinking on the level of "okay, she likes me, but she'll probably lose interest in me if I make myself more vulnerable"

 

So, if anyone, anyone here has any advice, suggestions, on little progressive steps I can take to become a less insecure guy around girls? And it's pretty much just girls in particular, I don't know why. I usually am a risktaker with everything else.

 

Cheers.

[providentielle]

Our heart is the most difficult thing to risk but we get the greatest rewards when we do. There isn't some magic thing you can do that will stop your feelings of insecurity but try to use how you felt when you gave a little of yourself to this girl. remember the feeling and realise that it worth taking the risk. Give her a chance, let her in. You can take it slow but the only way to move on from this feeling is to take a deep breath and dive in. Good luck