breakorbreakup Posted September 18, 2017 Share Posted September 18, 2017 My ex-ish boyfriend and I were together for 10 perfect months before breaking up one week ago. We've both been really stressed and busy. But, we have a killer connection. Incredible compatability, he's said we're soulmates, and we're best friends to boot. I was leaning on him (admittedly toooo much) emotionally as I was going through a really hard time, and consequently smothering him, which is a huge reason why we think the romance ended up on the back burner. So, we still both love on another and want to be with each other badly, we've both expressed that. But due to the breakup and the emotional heaviness of being my only support system and the weight of way too many expectations being placed on him, my ex wants space. We've seen each other twice since the breakup, once to talk through things and once we slept over together one night and it was amazing. I left feeling like we were a couple again. It feels like there does need to be a little space for us to get back on our own feet, I couldn't agree more. But my ex isn't phrasing it as a "break", because he thinks that's unfair to me. He's phrasing it as keeping things the way they are for now (broken up), taking time apart especially on his part to get some reprieve from the emotional heaviness and drama. We might see each other this weekend for dinner or to hang out a little, and then we will meet back up in about two weeks to see where we're at. I've let my ex know that I'm in therapy working on my issues which led to our issues as a couple, finding other sources besides just him for emotional support so as not to suffocate him, and am throwing myself into my work. He thinks that's very mature and I think it's a huge factor in his decision, that in getting help and becoming busy so my life isn't about him. I know he's not using this as time to see other people, he stressed the fact that neither of us should see other people in this time. But he's also saying, don't get your hopes up. He knows emotionally he really wants to be with me, but wants to make the most rational decision on whether or not we're compatible. My question is...where is he at in his head? Do you think after two weeks of light to no contact (which we discussed was the plan), getting away from the drama for a bit and him getting some much-needed alone time, he'll come back to me? Link to comment
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