Is it really time to move on?

[kbaby24]

I have been dating this guy since late Jan. Since then we really got close and I love him. Lately we don't spend as much time together and he knows it bothers me. He says he is busy with work and I have nothing to worry about, nothing has changed; he's just busy. I kind of believe him but it still bothers me. Today when we were talking I told him that he doesn't really show me attention and he's not consistent. He said its not on purpose and told me he loved me. We've had this conversation before though, so I feel like since he knows it bothers me he should just make the effort. I told him if he doesn't start being consistent, then we should just stop talking. He said I'm the one whose not consistent so I asked him if we were going to fix it and he said its up to me. I told him it would depend on if he would do the things I asked and he just told me to move on.

Like I said I do love him and I really don't want to move on. I don't want anybody else. I know I probably should have said I would change too but I wanted him to know that i was serious and want him to treat me a little better. We have stopped hanging out before and we come back to each other. I feel like he doesn't want to end it and maybe just said that because he was mad but idk. I want to text him again and just fix everything but idk if I should or should I really move on? What do you think?

[SherrySher]

Do you actually spend anytime together in person and do things? Are you still able to spend the time together and have intimacy? I can understand if he's busy at work but if he is not making time for you then it is a problem. You tried to talk to him about it and it sounds as though he is shifting blame onto you, which isn't fair.

 

A relationship does involve each partner making efforts for one another romantically, or things go dead.

And you have a valid point, inconsistency is not good. If you're not happy, you have a right to say and he should be trying to make you feel somewhat loved and wanted, even if he is working.

You need to understand to some degree if he is tired out but he still should try to make efforts at other times.

[kbaby24]

We went on two dates 2 weeks ago and I felt like he was trying but then just talking here and there after. I'm trying to understand but it's hard because we used to spend time together literally all the time

[MissCanuck]

So you are not officially a couple, I gather? Dating since January is quite a while to not have taken it further.

 

I think the writing is on the wall. People make time when they want to do so. If he isn't doing that, even by calling or otherwise letting you know he is thinking of you and would like to see you, then I think it would be better to just call it a day.

[SoJaded]

I wasted a year of my life in your shoes. Move on, show self-respect, talk to supportive friends and get new interests to help you through this.

 

And steer clear of online dating!

 

The last thing you need right now are pervs looking to hook-up temporarily.

[kbaby24]

He told me to come over yesterday and we talked it out. He said he's going to do what I asked and apologized so we're good. 😊