fresh breakup, desperate for advice

[bem72]

Well, this is the first time I've been here.

 

Long story short, I have non-exclusively dating this guy for over a year and a 1/2. He is my best friend too. We've had our ups and downs but we always ended up working it out. But not this time.

 

Everything was great, easy, happy. We went on a weekend vacation and everything changed. We stopped talking and he wanted space. I tried to do that as long as I could, but the anxiety was eating me alive and we finally met to talk today. He wants to stop the relationship and I'm hurt, but I am much more hurt that I'm loosing my best friend. Everything was so great, and then boom, it wasnt. I am having a hard time with that.

 

I did everything I could to make him happy, both romantically and in our friendship. I apologized and tried to learn from my mistakes and always stood up for him and for the first time, truly knew what it meant to be happy for someone else. But it still wasnt enough.

 

I am a very emotional person, and have been crying all day. I am looked as an adult, and I feel so pathetic for being upset like this. I have a full time job and training this week and I'm so worried I'm not going to be able to hold it together. He says we will still be friends but I dont know how much I believe that. I just wanted to be enough.

 

Please send any advice, encouragement, love and positivity you have, even though I'm a stranger. I don't want to be this way, but I dont think that'll ever change. I just want things back to the way they were a month ago, I want my best friend, I want to know how the hell I'm going to get over it.

[HurtNotBroken]

I know how you feel, just don't do the friends thing. I know he's your best friend, my ex was too, as well as my actual best friend and I've lost both of them. Today I am having dealing with it too, worked a 12 hour shift and there were quiet moments where I had to just hold the tears back. I work in catering, so seeing all the wedding stuff and happy couples is a little bit hard to deal with to be honest. You'll be fine though, just know that. You're not being pathetic, it's a natural reaction to having heartbreak. At least you were non-exclusive so you should be able to bounce back quick, unless you wanted exclusivity and he didn't then it may be harder.

 

Sounds like you may have put too much into it than you should've. However, the silver lining there is that you are capable of giving the proper amount of care to the one who comes along who will want to stick by you! Stay strong!

[roro25]

I will pray for you as I hope you will pray for me. We will get over our heart breaks and we will find who and what we deserve. Everything happens for a reason so just be happy that this happened now versus if it would have happened later on down the line. The funny thing is the week before my break I asked God "if this man is not for me, please take him out of my life" and boom it happened. If you are religious then you should pray. Watch movies and cry until you can't cry anymore on days you're free to release emotions so when you have important things going on, you won't have to feel the need to cry. Best of luck to you and message me if you need to talk more