Straight girl flirts when drunk?

[Poppet21]

Hey everyone. My question is about this married girl I know who I assume is straight. We have no each other for a while but only recently gone out drinking.

 

So the other week we were in a group and we all got really drunk. She's really chatty and these guys started hitting on her. She had had enough and then started wrapping herself around me telling them that I was her wife. She just stayed there for ages hugging me with her head buried in my neck. During the night she kept coming back to hug me or hold my hand. It's hard to explain but it was the type of hug where you feel everything, it's that tight.

 

I saw her again after that, sober, and she kept calling me wife but there was no touching or anything.

 

We then go out again and we start drinking. Even after the first drink she was already calling me wife and came to stand next to me and put her arms around me. As we got more drunk it was more hugging and more of her bringing up being my 'wife'. She did this thing where we were sat across the table and she put her hands out to hold hands across the table and then she started stroking them. One of the guys said he could see electric between us but I dunno he was drunk too but maybe it was noticeable between us.

 

I don't know what to make of it really. She knows I am a lesbian. She's married. I was the only one she was doing this to but then she probably feels closer to me in a friendly way to then take that further. I am trying to figure out if there is anything behind her behaviour as it only happens when she has a drink in her? I kinda thought one time then maybe nothing but to then continue the behaviour again then could there be anything more there?

[RedDress]

Sometimes I wish there were sound effects on the forums. For this one, I would play warning sirens. This woman is not your friend.

 

Speaking as a straight woman, it's super easy to get a guy (or guys) to stop flirting and bugging you. We do it to unattractive guys all the time. You give them the side-eye, say "not interested, dude" and physically move to another part of the bar. End of. Okay... some guys are very persistant. But if they follow you or "show up" again - that's why they hire those big, burly guys at the front door. They get paid for that. You just have to say "these guys won't leave me alone" and they will have a firm talk with them or throw them out.

 

If that's not what she is doing - and instead she is giggling, flirting, peacocking while saying "they are sooo annoying" - it's because she likes the attention/ego boost. And then bonus (for her)! She is with a lesbian friend! She can further tease them with the idea of being with a woman (lots of guys fantasize about that) AND she can get you going too.

 

It sounds like this woman has low self-esteem and is looking for a sexual ego boost.

 

Anyways - she is married. What are you even hoping will happen? That you can be her mistress? That she will leave her husband, divorce and be with you? That never works. You deserve SO much better than that. Like someone who is single and available and wants to build a future with you.

 

Friends don't flirt around and lead friends on. That's hurtful and selfish for her own petty ego-gains. That's true regardless of gender (man-woman, woman-woman, man-man).

 

I think you should walk away from this woman fast - or at least see her for what she is - someone seeking sexual attention from everyone.

[lostandhurt]

She is MARRIED! End of story.

 

It doesn't matter if she is straight, bi or bi curious or a closet lesbian because she is married.

 

She is out getting drunk while her husband is at home. If she was your wife how would you view her?

 

Put some distance between the two of you and if need be let her know that her comments and touching makes you uncomfortable since she is married.

 

Lost

[Poppet21]

I guess I would just like to know where I stand with her. The last time she did it, we were just with Work people and there were no guys bugging her. So I was trying to understand how she feels. If it's all a joke or if she has feelings for me.