Jump to content

Why do girls hit on me more aggresively than men? Im a girl.


Recommended Posts

I'm a woman, why do I get hit on regularly by other women? I'm a 26 old, apparently attractive multiracial women. When I was younger, I was always just approached by men, now that I'm older it appears as though women tend to be very straightforward and bold in their attempts to hit on me. All the experiences that I can recall where I was very cynically and openly groped and talked dirty to were by women. One time I went to a club with my friend and girl spanked my ass real hard and groped me and blew me a kiss as she walked away, I was dumbfounded, I just froze I didn't expect that. My best friend would always want me to go everywhere with her, even to the bathroom and her boyfriend would always freak out and get mad. It was awkward because he would tell her “why do you do that? Why do you force her to go even into the bathroom with you?”, I would say “uhmm I'm just looking away the whole time, she just always wants me to be there.” Once, I don't recall why exactly, she was crying and complaining about her bf and told me “why can't you just have a , you'd be perfect for me then,” I just laughed it off and changed the subject. We are no longer THAT close, because she married her bf and I now have a child. Anyway, there's this new girl at work, super confident, self-professed freak and porn star aspiring nympho, and she always, absolutely always comes behind me and slaps my butt, and says “sorry, I can't help it” and just like the girl at the club, walks away with a victorious smirk. She only does it when we are alone. When my bar/ restaurant coworkers get off work and sit around to talk and have a beer, she'll start talking in front of the guys about how she's not lesbian, but would be willing to “get down with me,” I just brushed it off and said “oh _____, that's definitely a compliment, I appreciate your kind words.” Just a couple days ago I clocked out from my shift and she was there at the bar, she called me over to have a drink with her, I had a drink and then another. And then she took my hand into hers and led me outside, then she told me she wanted me to walk with her to the restaurant next door, we went and it was closed, then she told me a full blown speech about how much she admires and appreciates me. She asked me to go to the bathroom with her, but when she saw that I was going to the bathroom too, she said “no come on, come in here with me.” So I did and she was just drunk talking the whole time and laughed because I was facing the wall, she's like “you don't have to face away, we both have vaginas,” so I said “Well yeah, but I rather still give people their space.” We went back to the bar and had another drink and she disappeared then came back and said that she was going to exchange a nude with the bartender for her tab. She's like “come to the bathroom with me.” She's drunk and we're walking with our arms interlaced, then we go into the bathroom and she takes off her skirt and puts her ass right there in my face and asks me how her ass looks, then hands me her phone and asks me to take a good picture. I was just shocked at how explicit this girl is. I acted cool and told her sure, “leaning that way is a better angle.” I feel like I'm not the kind of person to be offended or put off easily by people, maybe that's why things like this happen to me . The next day she was acting all cool like nothing had happened and even asked me if we had hung out the night before after the first few drinks, so I told her yeah that we hung out for quite a bit. I've never been attracted to women, in that way, although I do think they're beautiful creatures, but all this is starting to spark a question in my mind like, what's going on? Does my open-mindedness attract this kind of behavior from women. I've always just been sexually involved with men. Three to be exact, one with whom I lasted 6 years with, another man that I hooked up with 4 times before he had to go back home to a different state, and a one night stand with a 19 year old whose virginity I took in the back of my car. Any input is helpful, what do you all think. Please don't be douchebags, thanks ahead of time.

Link to comment

It sounds like the perfect storm of your attractiveness and the people you're hanging out with. Your open-mindedness also makes it more likely that someone will take a chance on hitting on you.


If you're tired of these encounters, stop accompanying these women to the restroom!

Link to comment

Yes... if I'm ever the subject of unwanted advances of a particular kind, I look at it from the point of view of the people doing the advancing. You are not responsible for the actions of others, but just think about this...


If you WANTED to attract sexually aggressive women, how would you behave and how would you respond to them? If a guy you weren't interested in was hitting on you like this

would be willing to “get down with me,”
how would you respond to that?


If a guy asked you to go behind the bikesheds with him, what would you make of his intentions? Would you be surprised if he made a pass at you if you did? If not, then why are you surprised when a woman who is clearly very sexually aggressive does the same thing (albeit in the restroom rather than behind the bikesheds)?


You need to establish clearer boundaries for yourself. If you don't like these encounters, then stop putting yourself in a position where this is likely to happen.

Link to comment


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Create New...