Cheated on the love of my life

[robin13]

I was 15 and she was 16 when we first met. I never had a girl before her but she had alot of guys before and was in sexual realtionships, guys used her and this annoyed me so much as we dated longer due to her ex sending me messages about their sexual past. We had trust issues and she kissed other guys at the very start when we were exclusive. I loved her but I couldn't get over her past or what she did. In school I was ridiculed and humiliated for being with her.

 

As time went on I became more and more controlling, I hated her being around her ex. I then cheated when she went away on holidays with all her friends and him as it hurt me so much. I was 17.

 

6 months later and my dad died suddenly. we had a bad relationship. I became so close to her but again her past hurt me alot, I went to ibiza that summer and kissed a few girls when drunk. I never told her. We both then went to Uni. We lived two hours away but with the trust issues and everything else I had to deal it all became unbearable for me. I partied and took alot of drugs and drank alot. I felt like crap. I treated her like and our relationship ended horrendously.

 

3 months on, she says she can't take me back because I cheated on her. I have changed my life around despite this and I have begged her every single day. She says she "doesn't know if we will get back together over summer. Yet she then says that she can't be with someone who cheated on her. I have started no contact yesterday. Do I have a chance of getting her back? We were so in love she wanted to marry me and she knows I want to marry her. I am a top uni on a sports scholarship and I've recently bagged a training contract with num 1 law firm in country. She knows I will provide her and I've told her I will give her everything and love her like she always should have been. Do you guys think she will come back or is all hope lost? She has been with other guys and I have a hunch she is seeing someone else.

[melancholy123]

You really need to give this up. Neither one of you trust the other and I doubt you will ever get over how many guys she's been with. You both are obviously young and have your whole lives ahead of you to find more compatible people. Sure you dont want to hear that but I think as you both grow up and mature you'll find more suitable partners.

[WombatShadow]

I agree with Melancholy. Relationships can totally come back after cheating, but it takes a lot of work and a really, really solid foundation to build back that trust. You already didn't trust her and cheated sort of out of revenge for what you construed as cheating.

 

Leave her alone. If she wants to come back (for whatever reason), you both will need to put in an awful lot of work, but she'll let you know. This is one situation where you both need to leave the other one go for a while until you've both grown up.