Huge Crush on Teacher

[ripley]

Hello everybody,

(English is not my first language, so excuse me for mistakes)

 

I know this sounds weird and so on but I really need your help, I have no clue how I should deal with it. I think it is best if I tell you everything.

 

So I have this one teacher, he is young, good-looking, really nice, has the best taste in music and movies and really cares about you. How amazing he really is, I realised when we were on a class trip. I have to say that I am not the most popular girl in class, so I spend most of my time alone. So did I on this trip. One evening everybody went of to hang out with their friends and I was sitting alone by the campfire. There were three teachers with us on the trip and they were sitting at a table a little away. So I was just sitting there when he suddenly came over and started talking to me. We had a really good conversation about movies and bands and stuff, all in general the evening was brilliant.

Then, back home things with my class got worse. I used to be the girl nobody really cared about, but now I was the girl who was hated by the too most popular girls in class. Well, it was kinda my mistake because I spoke up against them and well, now they spread rumours about me and the whole programme. Anyways, it was shortly before I had class with him, these girls came up to me and started "talking" to me. They were like really aggressive and shouted at me (it was because, as I said, I spoke up against them because they are the most disrespectful people I ever encountered) and said things like "who do you think you are" and so on. I managed to stay calm, but they kept screaming. Then, HE turned up. He let the class (and the two girls) go into the classroom and he went with me to another classroom and asked me what was going on. He wasn't asking in a aggressive way, he was more like really really worried. I don't know why, but I started crying. It was so embarrasing at this point, because I always pretend that I am okay and so on and I hate it when people see me crying but well, he did and he tried to comfort me, which worked really good.

When I explained the whole drama to him, he directly went to my tutor with me to talk to her and he offered me to go home and skip his class. I stayed and he told me that he admired how strong I am. Then he also talked to the girls and they are in really big trouble right now.

 

The day after he came up to me in the hallway to check if I was okay. I just love that he cares. Also, when he is around I feel a lot safer in school. Also, I don't really talk to my tutor about my problems, I just come to him. Always. And when I do he always tells me how happy he is that I tell him, so I don't have to carry around this with myself. Like he is so understanding and helpful and he is just so great.

 

And here we come to the point. I am afraid that I developed a crush on him. I am not sure if it is because he kinda was there when nobody else was or if I really have a crush on him. Over the last week, it got kind of out of control. In school, I always look out if he is around, I constantly think about him and I even had a dream about him. Also I can't but imagine kissing him (and even more). I know how wrong it is, but I kind of do it unconciously.

 

Does anybody has any experience with teacher crushes od how to quit fantasizing about (sexual) interactions with your teacher?

 

How do I "de-crush" him? Do I even have a crush on him? How do I stop these fantasies?

Please, I beg you, does someone has advice?

 

Thanks a lot

x ripley

[Wiseman2]

Start dating boys in real life. Crushes are m normal.