Questioning current relationship after seen ex of ages

[MatiasG]

This is my first post to please have some patience on me haha.

 

I'm currently on a serious relationship with a 26 year old woman named "Addy" I have been with her for over a year and soon to be moving in together. Of course I love her. Both my parents love her and both her parents love me. To all our friends things are going great we form a really good couple.

 

The issue comes that I went back to my home country and meet with my ex (Ellen 25) from here. Her and I had a long distance relationship on and off from the age of 14 to 19. We broke up because of me movingto another country. she's always helped me to show the best part of myself. Every time I'd come we would hangout. Every single time she touched me I would feel that spark, that head over heels feeling. We love each other even now but we never had sex, and always encourage each other to continue with our own lives. Our love is that of friends but with the fire of romance. Now 13 years since we known each other, she got pregnant by her current bf and he is treating her well. I couldn't be happier in all honesty, we both continue in the same situation love of friends but love of romance. I can move on with no problem but she's become my measurement for true love.

 

I just don't feel the same type of love for my current gf. I love Addy, but the spark when she touches me isn't there. To a certain point it feels like I'm settling down because I know that other type of love is out there somewhere.

 

An I wasting my time with Abby or should I continue on and accept that maybe every love is different?

[Wiseman2]

You have a more mature love with your current gf. There's nothing wrong with the giddy remembrances of that first childhood sweetheart. However, nostalgia is always a rose colored glasses situation. It there anything missing with your current gf?

[MatiasG]

Will the next comment kind of mentions it. There isn't infatuation anymore. But besides that there isn't anything else missing.

[MatiasG]

I see myself being friends with her for a while but not in love

[SadSadgirl]

infatuation is not love. you're experiencing real love, yes you are settling. it sounds like you are experiencing grass is greener syndrome. there's no relationship that will ALWAYS have infatuation.

[KantSleep]

I don't quite get this: "I see myself being friends with her for a while but not in love". Huh? You guys are moving in together. I doubt she will want to be your friend if you blindside her with a break-up However, I am not telling you not to do so. If you think the relationship is not what you want it to be, then do what you think is best. My only comment is I am not sure if you are being realistic about love. You might be chasing this "spark" indefinitely and end up alone.

[Rezie]

You love your girlfriend as a friend? Well in that case you shouldn't move in together.

 

I think you feel like you didn't get to experience the 'real' relationship with your ex anf.thats why you are viewing it as perfect. With your current girlfriend it is real adult relationship that also has the boring bits. As long as you compare your gf to your ex you will not be happy.