Hey, Need some clarity

[Misery1]

Me and my girlfriend have been going out for 4 months or so, but i've known her for about 3 years, and we've been 'together' for about 5-6 months. I just feel sometimes, that I am doing 110% in the relationship all the time, I make the plans, and the times, and I don't mind the actual work, I care for her so much, I don't even think about it, but it's the whole

meaning behind it. Why am I working so hard? you know.. I read that the girl should work too, and I don't want to suddenly stop doing what i'm doing.. and make her question why i'm not being as .. leaderish as before, because if I assume if she wants me as bad as I want her, she'll start making plans, and times to see me.. but what if she takes time to think, and thinks that if I won't make the plans, im boring, and maybe she will lose attractivness to me, but she always does things for me, and shows that she cares.. she's not even a bad person, and does make a lot of the plans.. but sometimes I just want to know she likes me as much as I like her.. im just ramblin on but I need to get this out.. I just want to know that I am appreciated as much as she is by me. How can I tell? what can I do? Anything.. it's a healthy relationship and we see each other all the time, I just don't want her to feel that if I don't make the plans... there won't be any.. how can I make it so that I feel we're both putting as much into this relationship. Please help.. Thanks.

[MetallicAguy]

If all you do is commit to this relationship and she sits there and accepts it..it isn't worth it. Your relationship will soon end. The girl should be pursuing YOU, not the other way around. Well stop caring for her, giving her attention, do you just want to drive her away and break-up?

[Beec]

If you give her everything and do everythign for her, then she may just take it. What's terrible is that she may soon begin to take it for granted. You should and need to back off. Don't task for anything, don't tell her to do anything, jsut stop doing some things, from time to time. Have an on and off switch.

[kskm]

It does take two, but to do this in a nice way I would sugges that you do this:

While talking to her say "I would really like to do something on saturday, but I think that I want you to make the plans this time"

 

This is easy to do and gets the point accross without being mean

[goddess23]

im oging to be straight to the point. girls say they want to be treated like princesses. true...we do. but if we're too content then we're not really happy. look persoanlly i could never be with someone who was totalllly into me. but a lot of girls really like that. so shes probably used to this treatment. but you need to just stop puttin in an effort for now. dont ignore her or anything just dont be callingher and making plans too often or as often as usual. see what happens. and seriously as ughh as this soudns im a firm believer that there is always one in the relationship. and i know this will cause controversy but lets just say ive seen it. but its all about balence. and you need ot make sure that she doesnt just take you for granted. and hte fact that you worry about how much she likes you is something that we've all gone through. there are no guarentees but you have to look at her behavior and as long as you two are happy and are pretttty equal its all good.

[justsweetgirl]

When one person does most of the planning and the initiating, sometimes it backfires in that the other feels his/her wishes are neglected. Ask her opinion before making plans.