Checked husbands voice mail....What a shock !!!

[landm1]

My world was turned upside down 2 weeks ago when I checked my husband's voice mail when he was in the shower. ( never checked his messages before) There were several messages from a woman . Obviously he was in the beginning of an affair. They had been speaking and meeting for the past 3 weeks. I find out it is an ex of his who I despise. My husband swears nothing sexual happened and I told him... You don't have to be screwing to be cheating on me. His first mistake was giving her his cell #. His second mistake was meeting her at a bar. And his third mistake was planning to meet her the night I found the voice mail. I threw his ass out that night which was a Wednesday and took him back on Saturday. I know he loves me and I love him. He is truly sorry for giving out his number and meeting her once. Am I a sucker for taking him back. We have been married 10 years and have two beautiful daughters.

[Ac143]

I don't know how much of that story I would believe....but, you know your husband best and if he said he never did anything sexual then, I don't think it was a bad choice to take him back. You have 2 children together and have been together for 10yrs, I think this is something you 2 can probably work out and move on....That's what marriage is all about right? If this is the first time at least. I would keep checking his voice mail......haha.....for awhile at least.

[mermayd]

my current situation with my bf is almost exactly the same. I think you made a wise choice by trying to work things out. I am trying to do the same with my bf and feel that in the long run, it will prove to just be a growing experience for both of us.

[pi_anochik]

You're not a sucker for taking him back. You showed immense strength by kicking him out. Alot of women I know would've given up and cried. I think you did the right thing! You showed him that it is NOT okay and that you WILL NOT just sit back and let him do that to you.

[KM]

I understand that you love him, but you need to give him the boot.

 

He obviously had mal-intent, and of course it would eventually lead to sex. He married you, he took a solem vow that he wouldn't be screwing other women...

 

I'm still young though, so, my advice might not be the best, but I think you should throw him out. That, or at least punish him by never giving him sex from you again... make him suffer, make him realize what he can't have...

[pi_anochik]

I'm not sure that punishing him by never having sex with him is such a great idea. In fact I'm positive.

 

Sex is a beautiful thing between a man and a woman that truly love each other. It's supposed to be a deep experience that brings a man and woman close together. You'll hear a lot of couples talking about how when something truly traumatic occurs, making love helps the soul heal. No, punishing him this way would not help at all.

 

Also, it would be punishing you as well

 

Not to mention, if the man's not getting enough sex, he's gonna look for it somewhere else. He might end up having sex with the woman he was talking to, which is what you have been trying to fight.