Please help me analyze this

[shayn]

I will try to be honest so everyone can help me. For my future reference too. It may be long but please bear with me. This is the first time I try to get a girl.

 

We are in same classes at college, she was in relationship for years and it ended very bad. We almost never talk until later. We started talking and texting alot for 2 months. Somehow she notices that I like her, she texted me I can’t give you what you want, I have been single for years, I am not ready”. I texted back nothing changes, I am just gonna be me”. We were good after that. But 3 weeks later she asked me again are you infatuated with me”, I said yes then next day I wrote her a letter to express my feeling. She read the letter, looked at me and kissed me. She asked bunch of questions “why I choose her, why not others etc.” and told me: “you have 8 months, take it slow and I can be your girlfriend or best friend”. After that day we were good, we talked and texted even more, sometimes late night, started to hug instead of saying good bye.

 

Our first argument started when we were working together because I got mad at her she was slow during work (not going in detail). After that even, she was very angry, she didn’t talk to me for 3 days. When we have chance to talk, she was crying, saying that you were so gay, that’s why I don’t want to date anyone at school. I forgive you now but I will be cautious with you”.

Later we back to normal but my behaviors haven’t change (main causes). (I was just teasing her) I kept making fun of her belly, calling her dress ugly and old, never compliment her good works, asking questions about her private life. Whenever we talk, she asks me about future I always say I do not know or I am not sure.

 

We are both busy either at school or work with minimal time to go out. You can imagine months go by like above. Until recently, she starts to talk about older richer guy. I get jealous and ask her that what you want? Are saying no to me?”, she says: “don’t rush, I do want to know more about you, we do not have much time to go out, just be normal and see where it goes”, I insist: “No I ask you want to find older men, you are saying no to me?” she says: “Yes older men are more established, you are still figuring out your life, so no no no. You are sweet and charming but you are not my type, you are soft”.

 

After that day, we back to normal talk. We still hug instead of saying hello or bye, still text and talk like before (but less frequent). We still hang out when we have a chance. I would add that she beautiful and outgoing, she can get any guy if she wants but she still single.

 

I may have answered my own questions. I admit that I was childish and immature

So my questions are:

- Did I screw up everything or she simply not interested in me?

- After period of time, if I really grow up into gentleman. Should I ask her for second chance? (provide she is still single)

- What your opinions from lady’s perspective?

 

EDIT: I don't my opinion from others. I should be more clear. She usually call me gay when I upset with her over minor issues and I just "OK" with everything without standing up for my own opinions, I sometimes dig up the old arguments too. Nothing to do with homo

What's why I admit that I was acting immature.

[Zaphod]

This was a strange one.

 

It started off quite sweet and sensitive, and then took a dark turn at around paragraph two, with a slingshot into random accusations of homosexuality, verbal bullying, and then threats of unfaithfulness. The way you lulled us in, then started paragraph two with "Our first argument" actually made me chuckle.

 

Cool story, bro. Gonna have to get back to you later on this one. Not quite sure what to make of it for now. You both sound like complete lunatics, if you don't mind me saying so, but I'm sure this isn't the case.

 

Dunno, I am tempted to call Troll.

[shayn]

Also whenever we argue she says it's OK, I dig it up few days later.

I am still young and immature, I am going to change a lot in future. I just want to know that if we still remain friends. After some time, I grow up more (good job, well behavior like a man) and I still have feeling for her. Should I ask her for second chance??

 

EDIT:

I guess I should be more clear. I had been teasing her with inappropriate jokes before I confess my feeling to her, wasn’t bullying her or something. I did talk sweet together with the jokes, she was OK with that. But I mean, no girl wants to hear bad jokes all the time, especially from the guy who likes her. After a while she may think this guy just play around, he is not that into me??

I don’t know how to explain it properly, I will try if anyone asks.

[No1]

Oh.. this one is simple..

You two are just not compatable.

Being flirty and fun is one thing but a relationship is another level. Other than work, you two have zero in common. There is another girl out there for you.

And quit analyzing every single sentence or how she looks at you. The simple truth is that you two are not compatable. Just be her friend and co-worker and leave it there.