I don't know what to do.

[Gardeningfool]

My ex broke up with me about 7 months ago. I have no idea why. I though he was going to be the man that I married. He told me that he just didn't love me. No reason no explanation. I didn't understand and my behavior after was not great. I cried , I contacted him, I went to his house once. He He would co tact me back very far and few between with one qord answers. He contacted me about a month later to have casual sex. Missing him so much I went running. He had given me hope. Finally after work months of this I couldn't do it anymore. I wrote him a letter explaining that this was hurting me way to much. We agreed to see eachother one last time to say goodbye and did just that. It was very sad. We didn't talk just had sex and snuggled for about an hour. I got up to leave he hugged me and kissed me goodbye.

Now it has been 7 months and I am have thins gnawing feeling all the time. I want to ask him questions I need some answers and I'm so afraid to contact him because I don't know if it the right thing. I was thinking of a letter. I have written one wishing he is well and explaining that I would like the opportunity to get my answers. I don't even need to see him I wish I could tho. If he simply just wrote back I can live with that. Should I be brave and do it. Or forget it?

[Wiseman2]

He gave you an honest answer. Unfortunately he doesn't love you. And sadly, he proved this by toying with you to get casual sex. Don't contact him or put yourself through this self defeating hell again.

He told me that he just didn't love me. He contacted me about a month later to have casual sex.

[nutbrownhare]

Forget it. If you do contact him, he may respond... to use you for casual sex, which will tear all your remaining self esteem to shreds (as you've already experienced). Or he won't respond, which in turn will pull the scabs off any healing you've managed to do in the meantime.

 

Never, ever, trouble yourself about why someone broke up with you. All you need to know is that they did, and this is an opportunity to move on and explore your own history, your own pain and grow as a person. The way people behave is a statement of who THEY are, not who you are. You've got your own issues without bothering about theirs.

 

Meanwhile, be kind to YOU. Make sure you get out and about with people who make you feel good about yourself, and do activities which will do likewise. Don't waste any more time on this apology for a man.

[Gardeningfool]

Forget it. If you do contact him, he may respond... to use you for casual sex, which will tear all your remaining self esteem to shreds (as you've already experienced). Or he won't respond, which in turn will pull the scabs off any healing you've managed to do in the meantime.

 

Never, ever, trouble yourself about why someone broke up with you. All you need to know is that they did, and this is an opportunity to move on and explore your own history, your own pain and grow as a person. The way people behave is a statement of who THEY are, not who you are. You've got your own issues without bothering about theirs.

 

Meanwhile, be kind to YOU. Make sure you get out and about with people who make you feel good about yourself, and do activities which will do likewise. Don't waste any more time on this apology for a man.

 

Thank you for your kind words

[Ms Darcy]

Bravery is making a plan to move on from your ex. Bravery is not reaching out to the source of your pain.