Still unsure of how serious this guy is about me

[missy1114]

I still find myself wondering if this guy is into me but is inexperienced or if he's stringing me along. I've been dating a 23-yo guy who goes to a different school for the past 3 months. We used to communicate via texting every 3-4 days and see each other once per week or every other week. Most of our dates are in public places and he'd initiate about half of them. We still haven't moved past 1st base (he's not a virgin btw). He's not super affectionate in person. I usually am the one to initiate holding hands when we're in public. He has introduced me to a couple of his classmates and I took him to a social event at my school last week. He has told me that he likes me and he agrees to be exclusive. He also said he's looking for a long-term relationship. However, he said he hasn't dated anyone in over a year and his longest relationship lasted about 8 months. When I took him to the social event, I told him I wasn't sure how I'd introduce him and he said I could tell my friends that he's my boyfriend if I want to. He's always really nice to me when we're together. He offered to drive me and be my DD that night. I ended up being pretty drunk but I remember that he drove me home instead of trying to take advantage of me.

 

A few things that make me doubt his feelings for me: although he now tries to text me at least once a day, he'd often take a couple of hours at least to respond to my text, even when he's asking me a question. He always answers the phone when I call him, but he's only called me once so far because I asked him to call me and I told him how much I like it when he calls. Yesterday he told me he'd call me but ended up getting drunk with his friends and didn't. He texted me this morning to apologize for not calling instead of actually calling me!

He refused to put our relationship status on FB. He said he'd rather keep his relationship status hidden on there. He doesn't post on FB often but he does use it regularly. I find that very odd since I think he should be proud of introducing me to his friends and family. Am I reading too much into this?

[Brokenheart99]

I'm no relationship expert but it seems like you're just an option to him. He's affectionate in person because why not? It's free intimacy, but he's not putting in enough. Maybe it's distance, maybe it's age or just the fact that he's not truly serious about wanting a relationship. Either way, in my opinion he doesn't seem serious. Just fun, casual option. Sorry..it sounds like you want a more meaningful relationship, If which is the case, he doesn't seem down for that.

[Hollyj]

I agree. He is not into you. Always follow the actions.

 

I would move on, as things have not progressed in all this time.

[Juliaml20]

Hi!

I think that you should not make any assumptions and ask him directly.

If the Facebook status is something you can deal with, so you should get away from here, because if there something so small, in bigger issues maybe there will be some bigger problems. Ask him directly, and if you don't feel comfortable, run. There's a lot of boys out there who are not unavailable, take your value!!!!!!

[mhowe]

I think he sees dating as a nice diversion and that college is his first priority. Smart fellow.

[tallydoo]

I think, based on the last several threads you've started about this guy, you're on two completely different pages for what you want. You can't force him to want something that he doesn't.

 

I'd move on and find someone who wants the same thing.

[CyntralTime]

If you are unsure where things are going with you guys, then it may be time for you to move on.