Rough times, will it get better?? HELP!!

[katiekate1982]

Hello everyone,

 

I've posted a few times on here, a quick recap of my situation. My ex is the one who broke up with me after we relocated to florida from wisconsin, he was cheating and said he didn't see us going anywhere as a couple, needless to say I left back home to wisconsin the very next day. Well anyways we purchased everything together as far as for setting up an apartment goes, he has it all. A few of my items are still down there as far as shoes, clothes, and knicknacks. He emailed me a few weeks ago and said he would mail me some of my belongings when he got his paycheck. I haven't received anything, he did call me about a week and a half ago, just to say hi and see how things were going with me, he didn't mention my things, nor did I we had a very pleasant conversation and I guess I didn't want to ruin that, he is a VERY moody guy, so @ the time I didn't want to make waves.

 

My questions are, i've been thinking about him sooo much lately, I think I still love him and am very much still hurt. We didn't end on good terms and he was a complete a- hole to me, this all happened about a month and a half ago. What can I do to help speed up the process and stop hurting so much? I have come to the realization that I probably will never receive my things from him, and thereforeeee really have no reason to talk to him, which I haven't been, I never call him except the one time I returned his call.

 

I just need any advice on what to do about feeling so crappy. I was also wondering is it "normal" to still fantasize about having a possible relationship with him in the future? (I know its probably not possible,cause we are now in different states). Why does he act so distant and as if he doesn't care, besides the obvious he isn't with me anymore? Please help any comments are welcome.

 

Sorry this post is soo long. I'm also sorry this post might not make so much sense, I have a couple other posts you can refer back to, sorry I don't know how to enter them into my post yet. Thank you all for being so supportive!!

 

Katie

[Snarfnaj]

Hey Katie,

 

Your post makes perfect sense and there's no need to apologize....ever. I've read your posts in the past and kinda know what you went through. I'm sorry you're still hurting so bad. I wish there's something I could say or do to take away some of the pain. Your break up reminds me a lot of my own, although for me it has been a while longer since it happened. After more then four months I still fantasize of a future with the person that left me and did me wrong. I think that is perfectly normal. The first two months right after I didn't have any ambitions, wishes, comfort or desires accept for wanting her to take my pain away. But she caused it in the first place! After a while I realized that I had to find my comfort in a different direction. Trust me Katie, when I say that if given enough time everything you think is "not normal", uncomfortable and neverending will slowly come to an end. After 4 months I know exactly what I want and what I think I deserve. The pain is not that sharp anymore, but is still there. But everyday I realize more and more that I have a lot to offer and that I deserve nothing less then a girl that is honest, respectful and loyal. I won't settle for less. So, Katie, I do understand your pain so well, but he can't take it away. A line was crossed and if you allow it, he'll hurt you again. I promise, in time, it will get better. Empty words right now, I know, but it is the honest truth. Myself and so many others here are living proof. You sound like a very loving and caring person. Be careful with yourself. Experience the pain, find the comfort of friends and family and surround yourself with love and trust. All my strength, Katie and if you need someone to talk to feel free to PM me anytime.

[kauaiangirl83]

hi,

I can relate to thinking about your ex even after things go bad. My ex used to hit me and sometimes i still think about him even though i'm with someone that does make me happy.

 

Whenever there's a break up, the best thing for you to do is to keep yourself busy. Hang out with your girls or try something new that you've always wanted to do. Just do something and you'll feel better, i promise. you can pm me if you need to.

 

Take care!