Two Part Jelousy about Boyfriend...

[heyguys]

situation # 1

 

This one isnt that bad. But I dont know if i am being paranoid but I feel like my boyfriend checks out other girls when we are together. i know guys do that (girls do too, even myself but discreetly and respectfully), but he never used to do that...I was like the best to him, and now i feel a little weird when i see a pretty girl walk by and he looks too...is it ok for me to feel jealous? I dont know if im making a big deal?

 

 

situation#2

 

Ok the bf from above and I have been together two years. We were having problems and he broke up with me. During that time he started to date other girls and eventually I started dating other guys. After a year we got back together. He realized he made a mistake for leaving and that he loved me very much and wanted to start over. I was estatic. Few months go by and I begin to think and be jealous of the girls he dated. (there were like 2 girls that he dated each for about two months each). I am beginning to feel really jealous NOW. I mean we used to still talk minimaly during the break up and we even talked about who we were dating and I was FINE. Now little things like restaurants he went to with them make me cringe when WE go together now. I cant stop thinking of them and if being in certain places makes him think of THEM too. How can I stop feeling jealous. Is this silly? I guess you can say I am jealous of the past. Normally I wouldnt be jealous of his exgf but I mean I was wiht him THEN them. i dont care of the gf he has had BEFORE me. Hope that makes sense. Also, one of those girls was his friend while we were dating and then they started dating...I dont know if that adds to this jalousy and discomfort. Please any adivce would be awesome!

[DN]

"I feell like my boyfriend checks out other girls when we are together. i know guys do that (girls do too, even myself but discreetly and respectfully), but he never used to do that

 

He realized he made a mistake for leaving and that he loved me very much and wanted to start over. I was estatic"

 

The answer to both points is the same: he is with you, says he loves you and is not trying to chase other women or hook back up with the ones he dated while you were apart. Actions speak louder than words.

 

Make sure that he continues to want to be with you by showing him that you love him. Don't get jealous and especially don't show him that you are jealous. People move away from pain and discomfort and towards pleasure and comfort. Don't cause him the latter but give him the former.

[adidas7fire]

I had posted something similar as a matter of fact. I just couldn't get my mind off other chicks that my boyfriend had dated and it bothered me to no end. But what I realized is that he was with me now, cared for me, and loved me for who I was and not acting to be. We talk about our feelings and anything that may be potentially a problem and that seems to have worked very well -- we couldn't be happier!

 

Yes, to be honest with you though, I believe it's natural for a chick to be jealous if her significant other eyeballs other chicks. As some might find it disrespectful, I guess it really depends on just how he looks at them or whatnot. I mean, if he's with you and sees another chick and stops and makes some sort of comment like "she's hottt!!! -- totally unacceptable. A guy must have respect for his woman and vice versa. So don't think you have any problem with feeling the slightest bit jealous... it's only natural but you must have confidence in yourself that your significant other is into you and only you. And if you are having issues with that, talk to him and tell him. A relationship can only get better is communciation is involved. I speak from experience! Good luck!

[MetallicAguy]

Well even I do this myself, lol. But, it's pretty normal, the worst case scenario though would be that your boring him with the relationship.

[Wyatt]

Wow...do I feel your pain. I posted about my girlfriend having guy friends and I am pretty sure she keeps in contact with ex-boyfriends occasionally. I also think about her being with men before me all the time and it just kills me. It's stupid to think people can't have a past, we all did, but I understand what you mean....you just can't get it out of your head.