jesus83 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I'm to be frank here, guys who are not "lookers" don't go to bars to pick up chicks. The guys who are successful at dating in bars are confident, conventionally good looking, and usually a bit younger (than you). It's time to try something else. You know, maybe you may get more women to talk to you when the lights are dark and they are drunk, but you're never going to anything remotely lasting. It won't even culminate in a date. That's not success. You're a smart lady. 😊 Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 Yeah, so what's the point of trying right? Cool. Thx guys! Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 You won't even get the above at a bar. You are too old for this sh*#t. You need to diversify your social options before you wake up in your 40's still living with a younger group of roommates (because your present roommates will probably move on to age appropriate living) with no dating prospects. For the record, my guy roommate is one year younger than me and has less of a social life than me and gets dates left and right through online dating. He has the benefit of being good looking. My other roommate is like a 26 year old chick that goes clubbing. (Less bars), gets hammered and has sex with guys on first or second night. Online dating gives people unlimited dating options. Too be fair, if I was able to get at least 1 date through online, I wouldn't be this sad about it. I take more of initiative to at least talk to women in real life scenarios than 70 percent of the guys I personally know. Link to comment
jesus83 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Dougie, you could play it like that, but that's really going against the odds. Only time that's ever worked for me, was when the gal was making eye contact and smiling at me, but I have a look that appeals to a good percentage of Hispanic women. Even then nothing became. How many couples do you know who met at the bus stop, out grocery store, or bar? It's always work, school, friends, neighborhood. Edit: online is just a way to sleep with unattractive girls. Link to comment
Fudgie Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Yeah, so what's the point of trying right? Cool. Thx guys! No one said not to try period. They said it's time to try something different. Look, you're getting numbers but no dates. That's not success. Which are you more committed to, finding a girl or the bar scene? Because right now you seem to be more in the bar scene. You'd rather stay there and keep being unsuccessful than change venues. How does that make sense? Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 No one said not to try period. They said it's time to try something different. Look, you're getting numbers but no dates. That's not success. Which are you more committed to, finding a girl or the bar scene? Because right now you seem to be more in the bar scene. You'd rather stay there and keep being unsuccessful than change venues. How does that make sense? Well I like the bar scene as a whole. You just go there to drink and listen to music, talk to bartender, talk to the regulars, play pool, watch sports, etc.. I'm not always there strictly to pick up girls if that makes sense especially if their is a game on. Or I'm incredibly bored out of mind. Sometimes I just like to watch people interact. I don't go to school. Work is not ideal at all. My friends are also my coworkers or roommates and they have smaller circles than I do. My coworkers are like 10 years younger than me. I might see another group of friends once a month but we always go out drinking out. I invite my roomies to board game events and they just laugh. I do a lot by myself anyways Link to comment
Fudgie Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 I'm not saying you have to give up going to the bar entirely because you do enjoy it otherwise. However, it's time to find another venue to meet women because going to the bar is clearly not working for you. I understand that you like the bar but why not branch out if you're not having success? Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Well I like the bar scene as a whole. You just go there to drink and listen to music, talk to bartender, talk to the regulars, play pool, watch sports, etc.. I'm not always there strictly to pick up girls if that makes sense especially if their is a game on. Or I'm incredibly bored out of mind. Sometimes I just like to watch people interact. I don't go to school. Work is not ideal at all. My friends are also my coworkers or roommates and they have smaller circles than I do. My coworkers are like 10 years younger than me. I might see another group of friends once a month but we always go out drinking out. I invite my roomies to board game events and they just laugh. I do a lot by myself anyways That's your answer - you're into saying no or dismissing other options and stubborn about the place you feel comfortable at where you're not meeting anyone to date. If you're not willing to get out of your comfort zone more than you do now then that's fine but that is most likely why you are not meeting women with potential for dating much less a relationship. Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Well I like the bar scene as a whole. You just go there to drink and listen to music, talk to bartender, talk to the regulars, play pool, watch sports, etc.. I'm not always there strictly to pick up girls if that makes sense especially if their is a game on. Or I'm incredibly bored out of mind. Sometimes I just like to watch people interact. I don't go to school. Work is not ideal at all. My friends are also my coworkers or roommates and they have smaller circles than I do. My coworkers are like 10 years younger than me. I might see another group of friends once a month but we always go out drinking out. I invite my roomies to board game events and they just laugh. I do a lot by myself anyways There is nothing wrong with hanging out at bars and pubs. Even at my advanced age I still go to pubs to watch English Premier League games and commiserate. But I don't expect to find a loved one from that type of environment. I expect to find that elsewhere. It is rare that couples find each other at boozers. Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 I'm not saying you have to give up going to the bar entirely because you do enjoy it otherwise. However, it's time to find another venue to meet women because going to the bar is clearly not working for you. I understand that you like the bar but why not branch out if you're not having success? I just don't know what other branches to go. I went with my roomies to the beach and I was miserable. I absolutely hate heat. It made me sick and I have terrible sunburns now. I even used the 50 sunblock!!! It wasn't until we went to the nearest bar when I had fun. I enjoy going bowling but no one goes with me. I guess it's to boring for them. I'll do things outside if it's like 60 degrees out and not sunny. I literally can throw up from 90 degree heat Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 Everyone keeps on saying volunteer work and "meet ups". I've gone to meet ups and I'm currently in a group. I have absolutely no desire to volunteer. It's just my personality. Women will notice in not genuine. No one gives me examples of how they got dates outside my comfort zones. If I'm not comfortable, how would I come off confident? Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 Why does everyone assume I want a relationship? Yes I do, with the right girl... But if I meet a girl and she just wants to date and gave sex all the time I'm not gonna dismiss it. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Why does everyone assume I want a relationship? Yes I do, with the right girl... But if I meet a girl and she just wants to date and gave sex all the time I'm not gonna dismiss it. Yes, you have mentioned that. Getting numbers from "girls" at bars doesn't seem to be resulting in a sexual arrangement either. If you would be open to a sexual arrangement or casual dating focused on sex just make sure you're willing to risk being a daddy and are ok with the STD risk too. Link to comment
Fudgie Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Why does everyone assume I want a relationship? Yes I do, with the right girl... But if I meet a girl and she just wants to date and gave sex all the time I'm not gonna dismiss it. I'm not assuming you want a relationship. I'm assuming you want to meet a girl with coitus that may or may not be long term, but coitus is your main priority. That being said, you're not having success at bars. You getting numbers that lead to nowhere, like I said, that's not success. You're not even getting sex out of it! Time to change things up. LOL, I'm sorry, I'm wondering why you're in LA if you can't stand 90 degree heat. I think going to the beach could be a fun way to meet people in general, especially if they are playing things like volleyball or what have you. Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 8, 2015 Author Share Posted July 8, 2015 I'm not assuming you want a relationship. I'm assuming you want to meet a girl with coitus that may or may not be long term, but coitus is your main priority. That being said, you're not having success at bars. You getting numbers that lead to nowhere, like I said, that's not success. You're not even getting sex out of it! Time to change things up. LOL, I'm sorry, I'm wondering why you're in LA if you can't stand 90 degree heat. I think going to the beach could be a fun way to meet people in general, especially if they are playing things like volleyball or what have you. I'm came to LA for entertainment opportunities. Both music and video/film/acting. My family goes to the beach every year. I never go and they accept that. Never in my life I've enjoyed the beach. Maybe if I wasn't pale and I wouldn't burn. I like it during night time. I dislike sunlight in general. Makes me tired and exhausted. Link to comment
Fudgie Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Yeah, I get that LA is one of the big places for the entertainment industry but still, LOL, I'd move to NYC! Anyway, it's time to try something new. Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Yeah, I get that LA is one of the big places for the entertainment industry but still, LOL, I'd move to NYC! Anyway, it's time to try something new. Or move to Vancouver. Dougie you're a vampire! Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 8, 2015 Author Share Posted July 8, 2015 Or move to Vancouver. Dougie you're a vampire! I would love to if I could get a job. I might be getting fired soon. I'm on my 3rd probation and they increased my quota. Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 8, 2015 Author Share Posted July 8, 2015 Yeah, I get that LA is one of the big places for the entertainment industry but still, LOL, I'd move to NYC! Anyway, it's time to try something new. NYC is more expensive than LA. I only make 10 dollars an hour and I might be getting fired soon. NYC was actually my first choice, but I don't make any money, and I can't ask my parents anymore. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 NYC is more expensive than LA. I only make 10 dollars an hour and I might be getting fired soon. NYC was actually my first choice, but I don't make any money, and I can't ask my parents anymore. What steps are you taking to get a new job/increase your skill-set? Link to comment
Fudgie Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 I think people have mentioned before that you may be ultimately happier/more self sufficient if you lived in a place with a lower cost of living, ie not NYC/LA. At some point, if you have to look at what you're doing and ask "Is this working?". Clearly, the bar scene is not working. It doesn't seem like LA is working either, since you are making $10/hour. Link to comment
Rosti87 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 I think people have mentioned before that you may be ultimately happier/more self sufficient if you lived in a place with a lower cost of living, ie not NYC/LA. At some point, if you have to look at what you're doing and ask "Is this working?". Clearly, the bar scene is not working. It doesn't seem like LA is working either, since you are making $10/hour. OP, I'm amazed you can even live with roommates in LA at that wage. I used to live in LA 18 years ago and the housing, income tax and daily costs did not buoy $10/hour back then... I can't imagine it now. I was in LA last month and was in a drug store. The clerk asked me if I wanted a bag and she wanted to charge me for it. There is a lot of nickle and dimeing there. Gas prices are ridiculous there. I'm amazed you can survive in that place. You need to find another place to live. Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 8, 2015 Author Share Posted July 8, 2015 What steps are you taking to get a new job/increase your skill-set? Job search --- INTERNET Skill-set --- I got the skills baby! Link to comment
Dougie_D Posted July 8, 2015 Author Share Posted July 8, 2015 OP, I'm amazed you can even live with roommates in LA at that wage. I used to live in LA 18 years ago and the housing, income tax and daily costs did not buoy $10/hour back then... I can't imagine it now. I was in LA last month and was in a drug store. The clerk asked me if I wanted a bag and she wanted to charge me for it. There is a lot of nickle and dimeing there. Gas prices are ridiculous there. I'm amazed you can survive in that place. You need to find another place to live. It's called living pay check to pay check. I don't spend on things. I actually take the bus now. I can save up to 80 dollars than before. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted July 8, 2015 Share Posted July 8, 2015 Job search --- INTERNET Skill-set --- I got the skills baby! I meant improving on your skills or acquiring different skills so you do not have to live paycheck to paycheck. Link to comment
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