ClarkK Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 There is this girl in this dance group I belong to. I can tell she has interest in me by the things she says and does. My question is concerned with this: I want to ask her out, but on her FB page I see multiple pictures of her and a guy (and in the description she raves about him). However, her profile pic and cover photo don't include the guy and her relationship status says single. Two weeks ago she brought a guy (I'm not positive it is the same guy from the pictures, but it could have been) to the group. It's the first time she has done that. She still seemed happy to see me, and she still seemed to have her usual flirty tone, but tuned down a little. Last week she didn't have the guy with her and she flirted with me as usual. To me it doesn't seen that she is dating the guy, but perhaps she has the hots for him more so than me. I am afraid if I ask her out and she says no, it'll be too awkward between us during the group in the future. But with Valentines Day coming up, I don't want to pass up a great opportunity. I am thinking I could approach it this way: Me: "Who was your friend from a few weeks ago?" Or if she brings the friend back "who's your friend?" Then I will get my answer. Then if they are not dating, I can say "Are you doing anything next Saturday?" Then if she says no, I can ask her out knowing she is available. Another concern I just thought of though is what if she isn't dating the guy, but wants to, so she would turn me down in hopes he will ask her out at some point? That puts my feelings out in the open and could make it very awkward when we dance. Please post your thoughts! Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 Who that guy is ...is none of your business. Ask he if she would like to go on a date. Don't do it around Valentine's day...too much pressure. Link to comment
Sarah691607309662 Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 Ask her to go out after class. This other guy should not be your concern. I know it is tough. Social media provides too much information. People are afraid to get hurt. Everyone seems to want a sure thing. There is no sure thing in life. Does she have a guy in her life or not - you still can get rejected. Asking her about that guy is out of question, unless you want to say something like that: "I want to marry you and I am concerned whether this other guy from your FB pics can be a problem? Why don't we go for coffee after the dancing class and discuss this matter at length?" Link to comment
ClarkK Posted February 7, 2015 Author Share Posted February 7, 2015 mhowe, I agree. I shouldn't care who the guy is. If her FB status says single, she must be single. Sarah69, I'm a little confused by your comment. I get that you say I shouldn't ask her about the guy, but why? Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I wouldn't ask her who that guy was unless you're friends with her...and it doesn't seem like you are (correct me if I'm wrong). If a guy I only met at a dance group, asked me who the guy I had brought with me was, I would feel he's invading my privacy. Just ask her to go out with you and get it over with. What's the worst thing that can happen? If she says no or finds some excuse, you tell her it's ok, smile and move on. No need for things to become awkward. Also, you don't have to tell her about your 'feelings' and stuff...just ask her out and take it from there. Link to comment
ClarkK Posted February 8, 2015 Author Share Posted February 8, 2015 Missmarple, that sounds very wise. Now someone else said I should wait because asking her for Valentines Day is too much pressure. Is that true or should I not be concerned by that? Link to comment
missmarple Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 If she likes you, Valentine's Day is fine. If she doesn't see you that way, the day doesn't matter. Link to comment
ClarkK Posted February 9, 2015 Author Share Posted February 9, 2015 Should I use the classic "are you doing anything on saturday?" "No" "Then how would you like to do something with me?" Or is there something wittier I could use? Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 9, 2015 Share Posted February 9, 2015 Ask her if she would like to go on a date...if yes, when would be a good time. Link to comment
ClarkK Posted February 9, 2015 Author Share Posted February 9, 2015 How about something like this? "I don't ever see you outside of class, but I'd like to. Can I get your number?" Link to comment
mhowe Posted February 10, 2015 Share Posted February 10, 2015 She said "no". Babe Ruth struck more times than he hit a home run. Link to comment
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