Advice needed. Ex girlfriend problems.

[dtorbitt]

Hi, I am new to the world of forums and posts so please be gentle with me!

 

My girlfriend of just over 2 years broke up with me a little over 6 months ago. However in that time we were still dating and hanging out together, we even went on holiday together in June and had a great time.

 

Whenever we got back from holiday, she decided that enough was enough and asked to cut ties with me.

 

I realise that its important for me to respect her wishes, but it has been difficult because I could see that we were really starting to get back on track again and we were truly enjoying ourselves.

 

The last time we spoke was 2 weeks ago now and im still not ready to give up on this. I am prepared to wait a little bit longer before making initial contact again.

 

I think she believes that i want to jump straight back in to a relationship with her, but in reality i want to try and start fresh again, dating, hanging out etc in an attempt to see if she thinks anything could be possible.

 

I am a strong believer in the fact that romance truly is not dead, so i have written a letter to her and have acquired the 7inch single of one of the first songs i ever played to her. My plan was to arrive on her doorstep an evening with these and a bunch of flowers and then ask her to accompany me to dinner.

 

I am already prepared for the fact that she might turn me down there and then, but she knows that i always give it my all so i know she would at least appreciate the gesture.

 

Any advice from anyone at all would be greatly appreciated. I genuinely have no idea as to whether or not this is a good idea or how anyone else would react in this situation. Please help.

 

Thank you.

 

I apologise if I am posting in the wrong place.

[panther]

This is really a strange story. I would have to understand why she broke up with you and why on earth would you hang out together after the break up (and go on a vacation together???). Going together on vacation seems like a relationship to me.

 

Break ups are hard, even for the dumper sometimes and that is why she would still have you around, to make things easier for her, to detach herself more slowly and more easily. My guess is when someone says they don't want to be with you, they mean it. And you showing up would only disturb her emotionally now.

[dtorbitt]

Thanks for the quick response panther.

 

It was a volatile relationship throughout the duration. We both had tendencies to act like little children between name calling and general arguing over silly things like social media. To the point where I have actually deleted and removed myself from everything purely because of where things got to.

 

I understand that when someone says they don't want a relationship or want to be with a person, then more often than not, they mean it. I don't understand however, why it then becomes a problem if I speak to the 'wrong' person or I change my relationship status. It's very confusing.

 

This past while has been the longest we have never been in contact, throughout the entire relationship and break up.

 

I'm just not sure about what to do, I have people telling me that I should walk away, then on the other hand, I have people telling me that I shouldn't give up.

 

I personally don't believe that it is too late to try and rebuild something, or to even start from scratch.

 

Do I take the chance? I just don't know what to do, or how to do it.

 

Thanks.

[p4ckfan]

good luck!!!