Really think I'm done with my mom this time.

[oitnb]

My mom has been stalking my dad and his girlfriend. Sending threatening texts, pictures of there house saying "I'm watching you" a bunch of crazy stuff.

 

My dad came by today and let me know he is probably going to have to file a restraining order, and since the house I live in is still his legal place of residence, it means she won't be allowed here.

 

A few minutes after my dad left my mom came by. And I honestly asked her when she is going to get over my dad and to please get therapy. She's living her life in a bottle of anger and revenge and that's not healthy. Part of me feels bad for her cause that's no way to live.

 

And she flipped out. Said she's mad at me because I'm cordial with my dad's new girlfriend (um sorry I don't hold grudges and just want to make peace with everyone) said she's mad at my dad for buying his girlfriend a car before me (his girlfriend bought the car, not him, and yes while I need a new vehicle because my truck is getting worn down, my dad goes above and beyond for me, pays all the bills at my house for me, gives me living expenses ect) swore that one of the kids wasn't my dad's bio child (my mom and girlfriends ex purposely screwed with the DNA tests, my dad's proved it to me) and told me she's mad at me because I'm "taking there side"

 

I'm not taking any side but the TRUTH. My mom is harassing my dad and his girlfriend and it's just so over dramatic and pointless! She's beating a dead horse. Yes they cheated and it was wrong and it hurt her, but that was over five years ago and she needs to MOVE ON. and she CERTAINLY paid my dad back by all the years of her drug abuse, stealing, and emotional abuse she inflicted on my dad that I witnessed first hand.

 

I mean her drug fueled antics were so bad my dad went to the ER multiple times for panic attacks. I know my dads no saint, he cheated yes, but my mom is probably the worse of two evils when it came to there marriage.

 

My life would basically be stress free if I didn't have the worry of my mom. Wondering if she's gonna get mad, avoiding having my siblings over in case she comes by, not dare mentioning my dad's girlfriend or kids around her so I can avoid a screaming match.

 

I'm so done. I've said it before but I mean what else can I do? My mom is crazy! And irresponsible. She constantly throws money at me that I DONT NEED, and part of me thinks she does it just so she can say to my dad "ha! I support her and you don't". But she's broke. She doesn't have her own place and is driving a vehicle she conned some man into buying for her. She's never truly been 100% self sufficient. She's always been living off of someone, in some way.

 

Hell, she even lived with me and my ex for awhile. And she's almost 50. WHEN will she learn? I feel like a parent worrying about there child here! And I'm the child!

 

And now I'll have to get all my school transfer info from her so I can finish it. I was letting her handle it because she enjoys doing it and well, she's better at it than me. But if I cut her out of my life I'll need all of it so I can do it and FINALLY get back into school so I can start my career. Which is another stress I have.

 

Gosh!

[abitbroken]

Suggest that your dad call the cops. And stay out of it. Don't ask mom why she bugs dad or doesn't like the girlfriend. It is their matter, not yours - in other words, don't rile mom up. When she talks about "them" tell her you have to go or hang up. Don't start conversations about them with her. There is just no point. Its futile.

 

Also, i suggest you enlist the help of a college guidance counseler/admissions office person rather than your mom. They do that in the administration office. Unless your mom worked at an admissions office she is not better qualified. Just take your stuff back say you want to look at it or better yet, get new copies from the school and be done with it

[Kendahke]

Why did you let your mom in?

 

Change the locks, if she still has keys and make sure your dad files the RO on her.

 

With some people, karma has to land hard on their heads for them to catch a clue. She's one of those people.

 

And it's time for you to handle your own business and stop letting mommy do it for you, if you want her out of your business and you want her drama out of your life. She has to face the consequences of her own actions and it doesn't mean that you have to be dragged down into it, too.

[abitbroken]

As I was thinking about it, i notice you come on her periodically and state that you are "done" with your mom or what she has done recently. It is good you finally set the boundary and kicked her out, but now I think its time to not have a dramatic "fine, she is dead to me" situation but actually cut ties on "jobs" she has in your life, whether that is the college stuff or whatnot. There cannot be a push-pull where you want to dramatically cut ties and then...oh wait, I need her...wait a minute.. come back, mom. The best answer often lies in the middle and is something less dramatic that eventually brings a similar result.. if you withdraw "jobs" that she has without her even knowing - no big speech but quietly take your papers and power - it will be easier for you to just let your mom be your mom. If she has some guys car - its not your concern. And you can hang up or not answer when you want to. If you want this big dramatic cut off with declarations and speeches, she is going to blast right back, but if you discreetly pull things away - she won't as much.