XBF slashed tire outside my new BF's house, HELP!!!!!

[TrueHeart]

My XBF and I have been on and off over the course of the entire summer and part of the fall. We had a falling out when he told me I was taking his "friendship with him too seriously"- It broke my heart. After that, I started dating other men, and we remained casual friends. One day, he found out I had a new BF and claimed I 'wasn't doing the right thing' because he didn't approve of the relationship... I fell in love with a mutual friends father.

 

A few weeks ago, he pretty much said he threw in the towel... I didn't hear from him for almost 3 weeks, then he called. STILL felt like he could make me do the right thing and end the relationship/friendship with our friend's father. I adamently said no, and it was none of his business. He went back with his XGF, and had been w/her ever since the 3 week NC started.

 

Just last night, I got a phone call from him around 10pm. We had been talking on and off for 3 weeks straight, and I wouldn't budge to his request. He'd check by my BF's house, check my house-- things like that. Kept telling me the last time he'd talk to me would be 'the end' and he'd walk away. After the phone call which consisted of him saying "I'll live to regret it, and he'll be there to see it. Good luck" I went out to my car, and my tire was slashed!!!!

 

I immediately called the police, and when the officer came over I filed a report for vandelism. The cop went over to his house, which literally is a block down the street to talk to him.... He wasn't home. After several attempts to try to find him, the officer gave me information on how to file a temporary order of protection against him.

 

I'm uncertain about it at this point... I am scared of him, but mostly I just want him to stop harassing me and stalking me per say. Think this order might help???? #-o

[Prosper]

Hi Pal,

It is hard to tell whether he slashed the tyre u had outside of the house or someone else did, which might be his XGF as well.

 

Filing a temporary order shld be enough to terrify him off, if that is what u want. Haha! If u find that he is irritating enough, then well do it.

 

But that doesnt mean that he will not be bold enough to come back to give u more trouble. Be careful of ur whereabouts and inform someone u know, ur parents shld u be stepping out of the house that day. And dun go out too late in the night, as he might be lurking around at ur place.

 

I can only advise u to be strong and bold as well, coz towards people like that it is always hard to tell. He could have meant u will regret one day for not choosing him, and asking him to leave, by being with a pleasant gal later. And another meaning the next. I dun sense any regret as far as u had written here. one word, trust in ur instinct.

 

Gal u are mature enough to have contact the police to talk abt it, and i believe u can handle the next to come. Just stay calm and cool, he can Do nothing to u.

 

Be praying for u...

[TrueHeart]

I do appreciate it! His XGF lives 3 hours north in school, and quite frankly is the opposite of him. I do not believe it was her, or even my BF's ex. It does sound like something he'd do though. A temporary Order of Protection lasts for 12 months... Perhaps that will be enough..

[Day_Walker]

I think what you should do is think of what he is capable of and then decide what you should do from there. Obviously he is upset over the decision that you have made and he doesnt support it. Hopefully in time he will let this go. I think you have to realize as long as there arent any witnesses then there is no real proof that he slashed your tires. Filing the order of protection could send him into a rage or it could calm him down. You know his personality so you need to decide what is appropriate.

[amanda22]

i would suggest letting everyone in your life know what is going on if you havent already. tell your parents (sometimes parents dont know and let the ex inside the house and stuff like that) let ur friends know, they might tell you they saw him lurking around your house. just make everyone is aware. just like daywalker said, you know him best and know what he is capable of. im proud you got the cops because he definitly went out of line. dont worry too much he may have just acted impulsively, but dont take this too lightly either.

[TrueHeart]

Thanks guys, I completely agree. After I've had a day to really let it sink in, he claimed he wasn't the one who slashed my tires, swears he was out with a friend... but I find it awefully convenient that he'd even mention the fact of damaging my car and "letting me know I'd regret it" if he was completely innocent.

 

I did hit a nerve, because he knew the cops came to the house and talked to his family. If THAT gets him to stay away, I'd be content with it. Even though I didn't see him, my INSTINCT knows it was him.. He's a sly dog, and I'm sure will try to weasel out of it.

 

I will leave it at the officer just verbally warning him, and the police report standing filing the vandelism.. If it has to go further, atleast EVERYTHING that happened that night, including the phone calls and the officer visit has already been documented.

[Belle]

True,

 

I think you know it was him. If you can record all calls from him I would do it. My ex husband did this stuff. He slashed my boyfrien'ds tires, threatened to kill me, followed me around at 3am and/or waited for me at my apartment when I came home from clubbing. The judge told him that if he even sneezed on teh restraining order he'd throw him in jail. Clearly he didn't cotton to wife beaters (which my ex was).

 

best of luck and do take care of yourself. He sounds like he covers his tracks well so you may have to trap him.

[TrueHeart]

Yikes.. Yeah. I guess now he's (my XBF) trying to say I'm harassing HIM!?! Going to email my company and tell them that I've been harassing him from my work internet.. This is getting out of hand.. I haven't spoke to him since Sunday. I'd be content at leaving this alone for a while... I have no interest in contacting him at all.. he's a loser