What am I supposed to do with this girl??

[loveninja]

Here's my situation. I am a 30 year old male. I am in a school program for 1 year. There are under 50 people in my class and I will be with these same people all year and see them every day. We are a month into the program and I have become extremely attracted to my lab partner. I know that she finds me very funny and seems to like me. She is 23 years old. She has a boyfriend who she has been dating for maybe 8 months. I guess I'm just looking for some advice as to how to deal with this situation. I know she must have some kind of idea that I like her. I do not want to make things awkward though, since I will be seeing her every day for the next year. I feel like I have to make it somewhat apparent that I like her as to avoid ending up in the friend zone. I know that she has a boyfriend right now and things are not going to go the way I would like them to right now. I just need some advice. anything helps. thanks

[mhowe]

Hard to believe you are thirty!

 

This is not highschool. This is the real world.

The woman has a bf.

You are not even friend zoned...you are her lab partner.

So, unless you want her to request a transfer because you are creeping her out with unwanted attempts at "some thing more" you put your crush in a shoebox and put it on a shelf in your closet.

 

Adults do not act on every thought that goes through their head.

[Mattiemae]

Really you just have to let things happen naturally if they're meant to be. Friendship is not a bad thing. It is really the foundation to have a healthy relationship in the future if does go that way. Like you said you only have known her for a month. What if at the end of the year you find out you don't really care for her? It's the best way to get to know someone, and really if she is a relationship too, you have to respect those boundaries. Weird things happen whose to say why you are in a class with her and she's your partner. We learn and grow from everyone, but not everyone is meant to be our partners in life. Only time will tell. For now just leave things the way they are and enjoy your classes with her.

[nutbrownhare]

Yes, what you're supposed to do with this girl is act appropriately towards her and concentrate on the studies which, after all, are the reason for you both being there.

 

She has a boyfriend. That means she's off limits. If she breaks up with her boyfriend then you can start to think again, but it's really uncomfortable for most people in relationships if others hit on them - in full knowledge of their relationship status. If you respect this girl (and if you don't, why are you attracted to her?) then you will respect everything about her, and that includes the fact that she's not available.

 

Many of us have had crushes on people who are unavailable for whatever reason; you need to put this one firmly on the back burner, all the more so because you're going to be seeing her every day, and just get on and enjoy your work together. Without the spectre of having made unwanted advances towards her.